Kindess Counts

"Kindness has converted more sinners than zeal, eloquence, or learning."

--Frederick William Faber

"Kindness: the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate." 

Such a simple word.  Such a simple definition.  So why is it so difficult for us to act on?  That's what kindness is--an act.  It is buying a meal for the homeless man sitting outside McDonald's.  It is telling someone they look beautiful. It is helping the lady in the grocery store who has too many things and not enough hands to hold them with.  It is tipping your waitress a little extra, because sometimes we all need a little extra.  It is looking for the best in people.  It is encouraging each other. 

It seems as though more often than not, kindness has been lost.  We are so quick to jab each other and bring each other down.  If we aren't talking bad about someone else then what is there to talk about really?  If we aren't complaining something must be wrong.  Why should I give my cab driver a bigger tip than he "deserves" when I'm barely making ends meet?  

But maybe, if we were all willing to help each other out, we'd all be a little better off.  Your smile could turn someone's day around.  Your money could give someone a meal they haven't had in days.  Your words, could give someone the courage to keep going.  

Life is hard.  Whether you are in middle school, high school, college, just recently graduated, mid-thirties, a new grandparent, or in the home stretch--some days are just a struggle.  Some mornings it is hard to get out of bed.  And some nights you can't keep the tears from escaping your eyes as your head hits the pillow.

We have each been given the power to choose to make the world a better place though.  And for those of us who have placed our hope in the Lord, it is not only a choice, but it is our duty.  

We are to choose joy.  Choose love.  Choose kindness.

Often times the words we say could never mean as much as the things we do.  For if we say we love someone, and yet treat them like dirt, do our words really mean anything?  We've all heard that actions speak louder than words and I believe that with my whole heart. 

My heart has been convicted recently that it is not in the right place.  I am too quick to push someone down to make myself look better, to bash someone to sound funny, to yell at someone because I'm frustrated.  Struggle, hurt, frustration, anger, sorrow....none of these give us reason to be unkind.  None of these give us reason to tear others down.  And unkindness will not ultimately fix any of our problems.  It will not ultimately numb our hurt.  It will not ultimately heal our sorrows.  It will not ultimately stifle our anger.  Unkindness will only bring others down with us. 

Goodness knows that I am far from kind.  It is a struggle for me that is deeply rooted in my heart.  It doesn't start with not gossiping.  It doesn't start with not walking past the homeless man.  It doesn't start with giving a generous tip.  

It starts with my heart.

And that is exactly where I have to start if I want to become the kind person that I desire to be. 

This has been a burden on my heart for the last few days and something that I wanted to share as I walk through this struggle and as I learn.  But I am so very confident, that if we all try to do just a little bit more each day, we can "be the change we want to see in the world". 

"Guard well within yourself that treasure, kindness.  Know how to give without hesitation, how to lose without regret, how to acquire without meanness.

--George Sand

Besties for the Resties

Everyone!  This is my best friend, Rachel (If you haven't figured that out already) and today is her 23rd birthday!  She's a special one.  She has been one of the most loyal and constant friends I have ever had and I cannot say enough how thankful I am for that.  

I was a quiet, awkward, and lonely person when we met at Tech and she saw me where I was and brought my personality back out again!  We have had loads of fun together, starting with that first semester of our friendship when she and Tori and I became inseparable.  There have been countless midnight Taco Bell runs, drives around town thinking we were the world's best rappers, late night "lake talks" about everything under the sun, and then there was that time that she and KP nearly made Tori and I wet our pants when they scared us at Locke and Dam in the middle of the night!  We know how to make our own fun, that's for sure.

But more than just a friendship filled with joy and laughter, Rachel has been there through hard times.  Times of struggle and soul searching, times of sadness and loss, and times of frustration and doubt.  We have both been through the loss of our grandpas together and more recently the loss of a dog (which we both know counts as a family member).  She has been one to comfort me when I am sad and tell me when I'm being ridiculous and I need to just chill.  

To anyone who hasn't had the chance or taken the time to really get to know Rachel, you are seriously missing out.  She's a good one.  She is the BEST older sister, a thoughtful grand-daughter, a daughter her parents can so easily be proud of, and the kind of friend everyone can only hope they are blessed enough to have!  She has a heart of gold that is always looking to fill the needs of others.  She can put a smile on your face when you need one.  She sees the simple things in life that so many of us can easily overlook.  She knows how to put her phone down and just be where she is and not worry about the stuff that doesn't matter.  She leads by example and not just words.  And most importantly, she has a solid and profound relationship with our Savior that inspires me to dig deeper and sit at His feet to learn more. I can't say enough good about her. 

Rachel has had such a great impact on my life and I pray that I will be able to take that and pay it forward to others.  Happy Birthday Rachel!  Love you, best friend! 

Michael Walton Foundation

To any of you who follow me on Facebook or Twitter I have been blowing up your newsfeeds with "The Michael Walton Foundation".  I'm sorry for that...but not really!  Since I have done so much promoting it recently I would like to post on her a little more about the organization and what we are all about!

Michael Walton is a former world class sprinter in the U.S.  In 2002 he wanted to give back to the kids in the Washington D.C. area and that was when the Michael Walton Foundation started to evolve.  Since then it has grown and Michael hosts many events and programs a year for over thousands of students in the D.C. area.  MWF is a non-profit designed to enlighten, expose, and empower youth leaders.

I have the privilege of being the Event Planning and Social Media intern for MWF and it has been an absolute joy thus far!  This is an organization that I am so proud to work for and represent!  Michael is truly a great and humble guy who cares deeply about the future of these kids.  And every person on staff is in this because they feel the exact same way.  This is a chance to reach out to adolescents and teens and not only tell them that they can reach their goals and dreams, but equip them to do so!  MWF aims it's programs towards teaching these kids and empowering them.  We want to make it possible for them to be whatever and go wherever they want when they grow up--because they can!

Right now, we are in the middle of getting ready for our big Silent Auction and Happy Hour Mixer Fundraiser that is coming up December 17th.  We will be having a drinks, dinner, and a silent auction in order to raise the funds we need to grow the organizations and the programs we offer to the kids.

One of the great programs that MWF puts on is the Speak Out to Reach Out Tour.  This is where we go to local schools and have speakers such as Miss America Laura Kaeppeler, former NFL cornerback Leigh Bodden, ESPN sports anchor Jorge Andres, and R&B singer Raheem DeVaughn, give the kids encouragement and advice about their futures!  It is a great way to get the kids involved and listening because they get to here important things from people that they are excited to listen to!

None of the things that MWF does are possible without charitable contributions and donations from people like you!  Your donations give us the ability to do what we do and make a huge impact in the lives of these kids!

If you would like to learn more about MWF and all the programs we put on visit our website at http://michaelwaltonfoundation.org/foundation/?page_id=7 .

OR watch this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pGkPX5em9QM

If you would like to contribute to MWF visit our donation site at http://www.indiegogo.com/projects/empower-the-michael-walton-foundation-youth-squad.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post and learn more about this wonderful organization!

New Directions

Last week, I bought a book by Dolvett Quince (trainer from The Biggest Loser) about his "diet" called the "3-1-2-1 Diet".  He doesn't like to call it a diet, because really that isn't what it is.  It is a lifestyle.  What we put in our bodies affects how well our bodies perform.  I am trying to refocus my habits and really make small, but good changes that are realistic, but possible.

My first experiments have been with stevia and quinoa.  Still researching how to use stevia when it comes to baking and cooking, but I've already successfully made frozen Greek yogurt with it and used it in smoothies.  Not bad and a little goes a long way!

As far as quinoa goes, I have yet to try it, but am planning to start experimenting tomorrow.  It has definitely become a trend and something that you see everywhere these days.  Until a few days ago, I didn't know how to pronounce it, much less cook it!  After some research though, I've found a few recipes that I think sound delicious.  I'm sharing the links to the blogs with these recipes and I will try to post how they turn out!  Breakfast recipes first!  I'm excited. :)

Quinoa Sweet Potato Breakfast Bake: http://www.familyfreshcooking.com/2012/02/20/quinoa-sweet-potato-breakfast-bake-recipe/#.UgEeDG2CozQ

Quinoa Omlette Bites: http://www.tablespoon.com/recipes/quinoa-omelette-bites/34e152b7-dae2-4db9-92a3-024f56c8e4da

Apple Cinnamon Quinoa Bites: http://www.andtheycookedhappilyeverafter.com/2013/01/07/apple-cinnamon-quinoa-bites-for-breakfast/

Back to the Mountain

Here we go again...another new adventure.

Yesterday, Nanee had a much needed knee replacement surgery.  It might even be my fault a little that she went through with it because when I lived with her and Papa I made her go to the doctor against her will and told her the surgery would be better in the long run.  It went well, was finished in an hour, and she got to go home today!

While she was in surgery Papa said that he would pay me to come home and take care of her for two weeks because she is going to require a lot of one on one care and rides to therapy every day.  With my experience working at RVT they would both be more comfortable having someone there who knows what this recovery looks like.  And obviously, Nanee and I are very close so it would be two weeks that we could spend together.

After a lot of pros/cons list making and phone calls I decided to go.  Thankfully, I intern for an awesome organization, The Michael Walton Foundation, that is going to allow me to work for them through email and phone calls.  So, for two weeks I will be heading back to the mountain to help out and then move back to D.C. to continue my work with MWF.

I'm actually a little sad to be leaving the city again for these two weeks, but I know this is what I need to do and where I need to be right now.  What an opportunity to be there for two of the people who have impacted my life most.  They provided me with a home this summer.  Nanee writes and calls me every week.  And they have both supported me in everything I have done.  I could not be more grateful to them and I can never repay them the love they have shown me, but I am so thrilled for this opportunity to spend time with them.

Surprise!

Last week I FINALLY got to share all the surprises I had been planning for a month!  Rachel found some awesomely cheap flights to Arkansas the weekend of Halloween, which also happens to be a favorite holiday and THE prettiest time of year in Arkansas.  So we flew home together on Wednesday night and Zac picked her up and Allison and Lily got me.  Allison was the only one in my family who knew I was coming and we were both DYING inside to tell everyone!

Lily was my first surprise.  She was told that they were picking up tickets for a trip Allison is going on later and to watch for a man who would come and bring them the tickets.  I got in around 10:30 that night and it was a struggle to even keep Lily awake that long, but when she saw me she got a sudden burst of energy!  She saw me and I hid behind a pole, but after seeing Rachel she said "Mom, that WAS Katie!"   She then hit Allison and said "I don't even like you!" and then ran to hug me.  It was a very sweet reunion.


The three of us then headed to my parents house and surprised them and the boys.  Lily and I stayed in the car and Allison brought them outside telling them Lily had a surprise.  I jumped out from behind the car and said "Trick or Treat!"  John Michael immediately hugged me and mom just stood there speechless (If you know her you know that never happens!).  After hugs and laughing we went inside and I had to surprise Stephen after he got out of the shower.  Bless him. Lol.

The next day, Allison got Claire and Rebekah to agree to come to Nanee and Papa's because Lily wanted them to see her costume when she trick or treated their house.  Claire and Blake were there when we got there, but Becks was running behind.  I was dressed in all black clothes with a black hooded cape and a mask.  We walked up to the porch and no one really noticed me at first.  Then, Claire asked who I was and all of a sudden realized it.  She didn't say anything but covered her mouth with her hand and started crying.  After Nanee tried to figure out who I was, I took my mask off.  Her reply?  "KATIE!  Oh my garsh!!"  Classic Nanee.  We sat around on the porch until Becks got there.  When she walked around to the porch I was dressed up with the bowl of candy in my lap.  Everyone tried to get her to grab some and she wouldn't.  Again, I removed my mask to surprise her!  The surprises were officially all out at that point!

We spent the next few days on the mountain, watching Avery play his last Jr. High football game and first Sr. High game, hammocking, and seeing friends.

On Saturday, I went up to Harrison for the annual Mouser Family Halloween Party!  We dressed up as the Billings and the Billings dressed up as the Mousers.  We couldn't have planned that better if we had tried.  I think it's safe to say we all know each other WAY too well!  It was such a blessing to get to go to church at FCC again and spend time with friends and Nana!! After an afternoon taking pictures at Maplewood we drove to Conway to spend the night with Jamie and Em before flying out Monday.

And we will just leave out the story about the flight.  Let's just say 5 hours of waiting in the Little Rock Airport and a complimentary $75 E-Certificate for United Airlines later, we rolled into our apartment at 12:30 a.m.

Corn, Carvings, and Crunchy Leaves

This Saturday (10/20/13) Rachel, Meredith, and I took a little jaunt to Frederick, Maryland to frolic through fields of corn and pumpkins.  Ultimately, there was a little less frolicking and a little more wandering, but it was a wonderful FALL afternoon!  The air was crisp and the leaves were crunchy....just a couple of my favorite characteristics of fall.

We started the afternoon going through a 6 acre corn maze.  At the ticket booth we were all given a piece of paper to stamp at the mailbox stations that we found throughout the maze and each stamp was one of 12 pieces to a map.  The idea was that after we had found each mailbox we would have a complete map of the maze to help us find our way out.  I was confident going into it that it would be challenging, but that we were all smart enough to figure it out together!  Well...a solid hour and a half later, we had 9 of our 12 stamps and decided we didn't even care to find the rest; we just wanted to find the exit!  And eventually we ended up making our way back out the entrance.  Let's just say that maybe corn mazes are more fun as a kid.  I might be lacking in the patience department.  Ha.

After making it back to the barn we hopped on a tractor pulled wagon ride that dropped us off in the middle of the pumpkin patch.  There were soooo many pumpkins--baby ones, big ones, orange ones, white ones.  We took our sweet time to pick the PERFECT pumpkins and then had a mini photo shoot with our fabulous finds.  Then we hopped back on the wagon, paid for our pumpkins, and then headed back to DC, but not before stopping for a long awaited dinner at Chili's! 

What a happy fall weekend!

Going North

Lyrics by Missy Higgins

I wanna dance the tango with chance

And I wanna ride on the wire

'Cause nothing gets done with dust in your gun

And nobody respects a liar

So, goodbye for a while

I'm off to explore every boundary and every door

Yeah, I'm going north

And I wanna know where children would go

If they never learned to be cool

'Cause nothing's achieved when pushed up a sleeve

So nobody thinks you're a fool

So, goodbye for a while

I'm out to learn more about who I really was before

Yeah, I'm going north

Up where the hunted hide with ease

Under the arms of eyeless trees

Up where the answers fall like leaves

Or when your love is all I need

Yeah, I'm going north

I'm going north

Yeah, I'm going north, yeah

 

Shutdown

I suppose since I live in D.C. now, I should include a little bit of history on my blog.  And there is no bigger topic in this city right now than the government shutdown.  It's been 13 days and you can tell the strain that it's putting on people already.  The city is quieter with a little less hustle and bustle than usual.  Except for the occasional protests and rallies capitol hill is bare.  Everyone is holding out...waiting for things to get sorted out and running again. 

Weekend Adventures

 Last Wednesday I got an awesome surprise!  Rachel graduated from high school with Austin Tate and she was able to get in touch with him and get some tickets from him for this weekend's game at Rutgers!  I've been a little depressed recently about missing out on football season and not getting to watch my Hogs play, so I was thrilled when I heard I was going to get to go!  And also, my sweet friend, Faithy, perfectly timed a letter to Rachel and I and included some Razorback decals in it!  I have the BEST friends!! 

We headed out Saturday morning and had a three and a half hour drive from DC to Rutgers University.  And to my very great excitement we found a Chic-fil-a on the way and I got chicken minis for breakfast!!!! Woohoo!  Haha.  Oh the little things... Obviously, losing was a little bit of a disappointment, and I most definitely do NOT ever want to live in New Jersey...or really ever visit there again...BUT it was a great, great day spent with other Arkansans and people who love our great state and our Razorback football boys! 

               






We stayed in NJ for the night and then drove 30 minutes the next day to Philly--The City of Brotherly Love.  I had never been to Philly before and it was such a fun trip getting to see The Liberty Bell and Independence Hall and explore the city!  And yes...yes, I took a picture with the Philly's mascot.  However, take note that this Cardinals fan is not being swayed in any way, just being a tourist for the day.  


This is one of the best best best parts of living in DC!  I am so very close to some amazing places and awesome historical landmarks.  It's like...living on vacation!  Almost.  It's something I think I've taken for granted and I'm realizing what an opportunity it is to be close enough that I can spend my weekends seeing things that some people only dream of getting to see.  Oh adventures.... :)

You May Say I'm a Dreamer

I've started to write this post a few times and honestly wasn't sure how to finish it so I erased it and gave up only to try to write it over and over again.  I'm determined that I will finish it today, because I'm sure that there is someone else out there in my shoes and someone else out there who needs to know they're not the only one going through this! 

As a recent college graduate I'm getting very used to hearing the question "So what's next?" or "What are you doing now?"  Sometimes when I hear that I want to curl up in a ball and become invisible.  I'd like to shrivel up and hope no one notices me.  It's like those last few weeks of high school all over again when the only things people seemed to care about were where you were going to college and what you were going to major in.  At the time that seemed like the biggest decision of my life.  I just knew that if I picked the wrong school or the wrong major I was going to ruin my life forever and miss something majorly important.  I definitely lost sleep and my appetite over it and now I wonder why.  Because to be honest, I know me and I know that I would have made great friends and had great success in college not matter where I had gone and what I had studied because I was determined to do so!  Thankfully, I did choose the school that I did, because I met my best friends there and I got a degree that I loved.  But I know that it was not an "end of the world" decision that I was making when I chose those things.  

Here I am again though.  I'm back at that place of "What comes next?"  Trying to figure out where I'm "supposed" to be and what I'm "supposed" to do.  And again, it seems like the end of the world.  It seems like life is a ticking time bomb and if I don't hurry and "figure my life out"  I'm going to miss every amazing opportunity I ever dreamed of!  And I have dreamed of a lot....

For anyone who knows me well, I am a dreamer at heart.  From the moment I watched Peter Pan and believed with my whole heart that Neverland was a real place to the first time I heard the story of The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe and tried countless times to find Narnia through the wardrobe in my bedroom, I've always had that bigger than the here and now, shoot for the stars imagination!  I love the crazy big, over the top ideas and dreams!  Throughout my life I've had plans to open my own flower shop, work with the whales at Sea World, live on the mission field in Mexico, run my own summer camp, be an Occupational Therapist, go to med school, write a book, become a singer, open a cupcake bakery, be a massage therapist, work for a huge PR firm, and most recently to start my own photography business.  Clearly, most of these things are completely unrelated to each other, but each one of them comes from a love for something specific deep inside of me.  

My frustration with myself always comes from the fact that I feel like I genuinely love entirely too many things.  If someone were to ask me to sum myself up briefly I would say "I am a gardening animal lover with a deep love for living life simply with children of all ethnicities in the sweaty heat of summer, hoping to one day work in the medical world while writing, singing, baking, and giving massages to a serious PR guru, all the while photographing all these shenanigans".  Because that makes so much sense, right?  How the heck can I deeply and genuinely love and pursue all of these things in one short lifetime?!  That's the thing I always forget though....I have a lifetime.  

Now granted, we don't know how long we have on this earth.  Thankfully, God already has my days numbered and He knows.  He's got it all figured out while my tiny brain is over here still trying to separate the sunflowers and the dolphins.  But I do know that this is my one life that I've been given and I want to live it to the very fullest!  I want to give it everything I've got and never look back with regrets.  

I'm learning that it's okay to not know.  It's okay to not have it all figured out.  Who knows!  Maybe I'll accomplish all those dreams (minus the whole marine biologist and med school thing) in my lifetime.  But for now, it's okay to just pick one and pursue it for a little while.  If it works out: great!  If it doesn't: that's okay too.  It's okay to not have a plan all the time.  It's okay to just stop and take life in.  Most people don't hop right out of college and into their dream job with everything they ever wanted in life.  But right here and right now is where God has me and He has me here for a reason.  And with His guidance I will find where I'm "supposed" to be when I'm "supposed" to be there.  

To everything there is a season, and a time for every matter or purpose under heaven. – Ecclesiastes 3:1

Adventure

ad·ven·ture
verb

• engage in hazardous and exciting activity, esp. the exploration of unknown territory.

Once upon a time I used to be safe.  I used to color inside the lines.  I used to "follow the leader wherever he may go." (tee-dum, tee-dee, a tee-da-lee-dum-dee-day...just a little Peter Pan sing-a-long side note). However, now, I am adventuring.  I am stepping outside of my comfortable boundaries and seeking to live life to the fullest!  I'm letting go, not planning, and flying by the seat of my pants. 

 It is completely new, utterly exhilarating, and absolutely terrifying.

In the past few weeks I have left everything I ever knew to be "home".  I have moved to a place filled with exotic food trucks, fantastical fountains, concrete artwork, and outlandish beings.  And now this is "home".  What an entirely electrifying experience!

I spend each day reminding myself, "This is real life! You really did this!  You really did step out of your comfort zone and take this giant leap!"  I did.  And I am loving it! 

Don't get me wrong.  There are moments that I freak out and questions my decisions.  There are moments that I miss the familiarity and the pleasures of home.  There are moments that all I want is to be curled up on Nanee and Papa's couch eating BlueBell ice cream, drinking Dr. Pepper, and watching Aristocats with Lily.  But in not taking this leap, I would have disappointed myself.  I would have always wondered.  I would have become complacent.  I never want to become complacent.  I want to always grow, always learn, always explore.

I want to always adventure.  

And adventure I will! 

So here I go... 

Romance

These past few weeks I've been reading the book Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge.  Each day I have learned something new or had my eyes opened to something, but what I read this morning really grabbed my attention and painted a beautiful picture of our romance with Christ.

"Can there be any doubt that God wants to be sought after?  The first and greatest of all commands is to love Him (Mark 12:29-30, Matt. 22:36-38).  He wants us to love him.  To seek him with all our hearts.  A woman longs to be sought after, too, with the whole heart of her pursuer.  God longs to be desired.  Just as a woman longs to be desired.  This is not some weakness or insecurity on the part of a woman, that deep yearning to be desired. 'Take me for longing,' Alison Krauss sings, 'or leave me behind.'  God feels the same way.  Remember the story of Martha and Mary?  Mary chose God, and Jesus said that is what he wanted.  'Mary has chosen what is better' (Luke 10:42).  She chose me.

Life changes dramatically when romance comes into our lives.  Christianity changes dramatically when we discover that it, too, is a great romance.  That God yearns to share a life of beauty, intimacy, and adventure with us.  'I have loved you with an everlasting love' (Jer. 31:3).  This whole world was made for romance--the rivers and the glens, the meadows and beaches.  Flowers, music, a kiss.  But we have a way of forgetting all that, losing ourselves in work and worry.  Eve--God's message to the world in feminine form--invites us to romance.  Through her, God makes romance a priority of the universe. 

So God endows Woman with certain qualities that are essential to relationship, qualities that speak of God.  She is inviting.  She is vulnerable.  She is tender.  She embodies mercy.  She is also fierce and fiercely devoted.  As the old saying goes, 'Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.'  That's just how God acts when He isn't chosen.  'I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God who will not share your affection with any other god!' (Ex. 20:5 NLT).  A woman's righteous jealousy speaks of the jealousy of God for us.  Tender and inviting, intimate and alluring, fiercely devoted.  Oh yes, our God has a passionate, romantic heart.  Just look at Eve."

I want to be a Mary--passionately in love with my beautiful Savior who loves me so deeply in return and never too busy to spend time alone with Him.   

See you when I see you...

Wellllllll.....It's that time of year again.  Finals week...the week that I get all weepy and sappy and a little bit depressed because I have to say goodbye to everyone for the summer.  Except this year is a little different.  This year I have friends who are leaving and not coming back next year.  Friends who RUINED my plans for having another whole year before we had to do these final goodbyes...really guys??!  Kiddingggg...except not really! Ha.  

But as much as I make this out to be the worst week of my life and act like the world is coming to an end (yeah, yeah, I know I'm dramatic) it's really been a good week in some ways.  I've been giving a lot of thought to these wonderful friendships I have here and the blessings that these friends have been in my life.  And as I've been doing that I thought I'd share a little bit about these sweet people I'm going to miss so much! 

Love love love her!!!

Let's start out with the ever so animated Kristina Villines! :)  For anyone who knows her, the word "animated" doesn't really do her justice, but it's the closest thing in my mind to describing her!  Kristina was one of the first people I met when I came to Tech!  Taylor Thompson and I walked over to the Wesley Foundation for Frogappoloza not having ANY clue what we were getting ourselves into! ha.  We were a little late so we grabbed some food and sat on the ground beside Kristina Villines.  She immediately started talking to us and getting to know us.  And that was the beginning of a beeeeeeautiful friendship! Lol.  Some of my favorite memories with Kristina include driving to Nebo, windows down, singing "My Heart Will Go On" at the top of our lungs and making sure that everyone within five miles could hear us; cuddling as close as we possible could to each other at the Great Frog Getaway on tiny bunk beds that were pushed together as we almost froze to death; taking our age to age kids to Sonic together; giggling in the back of Ching Zeng's class; the best eyebrow waxing jobs EVER!; being thrown over her shoulders and dropped on my head while trying to take piggy pack pictures; and getting tackled and then nuzzled.....Kristina knows how to give the BEST hugs!! :)  You'll always be my little cuddle buddy and the best nuzzler ever! :)  Luuuuuv you sis!

Next...Faithyyyyy!  Ohhhh Faithy! :)  I have had THE best time making memories with Faith Newton throughout this past year!  I've known her since freshman year, but for some reason we didn't start hanging out till recently?  That was stupid because we were definitely meant to be friends!   I literally think I laugh more with Faith that just about anyone.  We can just look at each other and die laughing.  And I love it!  Last semester we went to a concert which brought about my obsession with Eden's Edge.  Faith has me hooked on them!  Sooo...she can't complain when it's all I want to listen to now!  Haha.  I love our "feet aren't touching the floor" moments with Rachel and walking around downtown Little Rock (including the Kroger) laughing at everything..even if it wasn't actually all that funny?  "Please, remove your aprons before entering the restroom."  Lol.  And the recent river trips have been memories I'll never forget!  "I'm going through the rapiiiiiiiidddsssss!"  Let's be honest, I wouldn't be nearly as good at navigating rapids if it wasn't for your expert advice on finding the "V"!  I'm so thankful to have gotten to know the sweet, hard-working, loyal, fun-loving Faithy this past year and I will miss her SO much next year! :(  Don't forget me in D.C.!!!!!

Oh Torpuppy!!  Your turn! hehe. Victoria (Tori) Wehunt....I just wanted to use the full name for effect! lol.  I don't actually know if I should start of with something sappy or something funny.  Because...let's be honest, we've had plenty of both!  Together, the two of us probably produce enough tears to supply all the rivers in Arkansas with enough water to float year round!  And we don't even have to be sad!  Usually, it's just because of some Khloe and Lamar episode or something like that! Ha.  We are "two minds in one body"!  All I have to do is look at Tordawg from across the room and I know know exactly what she's thinking and she knows what I'm thinking!  We're just good like that!  She shares my love for taking pictures, coloring, country music, kids, the animal shelter, snow cones, Sonic happy hour, the lake, and the Kardashians!  We've been on too many road trips to count them all--Florida, Passion, Magtown, Harrison....just to name a few!  And Tor...you've successfully added Beaches to my list of favorite movies!  LOVE! :)  Thank you for being a best friend since freshman year!!  You're one of the few people who's stuck by this attitude-filled, sassy, mouthy, emotional, obnoxious person that I am! lol.  I love you so much and if you don't come down and see me from Fort Smith I WILL grab Kiwi and Jilliann and track you down and I'm sure they will be happy to assist me in yelling at your whiiiiiiile sitting on you and finding your belly button!! Kay? ;)

Last but not least I have to talk about Rach--Rooms, Razzie, Rackel, Squeaky, Sweet Baby Rae Rae!  You have a lot of names ya know?  lol.  This girl has been with me as long as Tordawg and has put up with at least as much of my attitude too!  She helps me to pull it together when I'm an emotional baby about the most ridiculous things and she always bears with me during allllll my obnoxious photoshoots! haha.  A few words of wisdom from Rach include "It is what it is"..."Bubble!! Get in a bubble!!"...and "STOP APOLOGING!"...just to name a few.  We have basically made it through the whole world of Mario together.  That's a pretty darn loooong journey!  We have been friends long enough for me to watch sweet little Allie grow up...right before my eyes....*sniff*.  She used to be a wittle puppy and now she's jumping through hula-hoops over my back!  I can't believe it!  Rachel's sweet family has basically adopted me and let me visit more times than I can count (mostly because Zac reeeeally likes cookies! Ha).  I'm so thankful to you, Rach, for looking past the weirdy, homeschool-ness (lol) and choosing to be my friend anyway! haha. I'm so proud of you for all of your hard work and for making it to D.C.!!  I'm gonna miss you like crazy and if you ever decide that you miss Russellville too much and just need to move back, I'll make a spot on the floor of my single in Tucker for a twin-sized air mattress!  But do NOT expect me to make room in my closet for you! haha. Kiddinggggg! (kinda.)  Looooove you!

As much as I hate these "see ya laters", they are a part of life and something I have to learn to deal with.  In the perfect words of Jason Aldean:

"God made this whole world round

And maybe it's that way

So the paths we go down

Yeah, will cross again someday.

See you when I see you

Another place, some other time.

If I ever get down your way,

or you're ever up around mine.

We'll laugh about the old days

And catch up on the new.

I'll see you when I see you.

And I hope it's someday soon."

New Directions

I've started to write this post more times than I can count and have failed, but I think I am finally going to be able to do it today. As many of you know, I have worked at Camp Solgohachia for the past four summers and can't say enough good things about it. I went to day camp and resident camp there as a kid with my church group and "grew up" to be a counselor! And it has been more than I ever could have hoped for!

Camp stretched me in so many ways. It taught me flexibility and the ability to think on the spot, whether that be making up a goofy game to kill 10 minutes of time between the end of an activity and lunch or answering the oh so thought-provoking questions that 9-year-olds ask. It taught me selflessness..that I'm not the only one who is tired and maybe there is another counselor who could really use a little break with the kids in the shade while I take a turn with the kids out on the pond. Through camp I learned to be real. Kids know when you're actually listening to them and when you're just pretending to listen while your mind is otherwise preoccupied. Camp taught me to give my all, to go hard or go home. Don't just walk of the zipline platform, jump off! Backwards!!! (No matter how scared you are!) I learned to keep pushing. Even when I'm tired, even when I'm emotionally drained, even when I don't know what to do with a situation...stop, ask God for guidance, and keep going! I have learned countless, irreplaceable lessons that I will never forget.

Not only did I learn so much from the situations, but I learned so much through my fellow counselors. God blessed us with an AMAZING group of people last year! And not only were those people great great great counselors, but they were and still are sweet friends that hold a special place in my heart! God brought us all together for a summer to learn from and help each other, and then sent us back to our homes, schools, and separate towns to take what we learned and share it; to live life better than before.

My bosses were outstanding. John and Alfie Thomas have hearts for the Lord and their kids and this camp unlike anything I've seen before. Their passion and drive is inspiring and their prayer life pushes me to want to greatly improve my own. Brandon came to our camp, where things had been done in much the same way for a long time, and put much effort, thought, and hard work into making it a better place where kids can learn about the love of the Father. And he did an outstanding job! He made so many improvements and as someone who has been going there my whole life it was awesome to see the place come alive and be revamped! Mike and Cindy and Teresa loved us like we were their own kids and made all of us counselors feel like we were at home even in those long weeks and days when we couldn't be home with our families! They took us in and made us into one big family. :)

And then there are the kids...oh the kids! My favorite part of it all! They have made me laugh and cry and do both at the same time over and over again! So many of them not only allowed me the opportunity to make an impact in their lives, but they also impacted mine. They have shown me, each in there own little way, a little taste of the kingdom of God and His abounding love! And so many of these kids also came with church groups led by leaders who still, even during the school year, contact me to ask how I'm doing and pray for me! What a blessing!!!

My heart literally cannot express with words the deep love I have for this place and for this ministry.

So why then, am I not going back this summer?

Because this summer God is leading me in a new direction. Just last week I was offered a position at River Valley Therapy and Sports Medicine in Russellville, as a therapy aide. And I took it. I have been looking for a job for during the school year to begin really saving money and to improve my resume and gain some great experience. And this is perfect!! I started training last week and start work tomorrow. I will work the rest of this semester and all through the summer, and Lord willing still have a job when school starts back. As I've been training this week I've really enjoyed what I've been learning and I think this job is going to be a great fit for me. It's what I've been praying for and I believe this is God's way of telling me it's time to move on..or at the very least take a little camp break and I think this is right.

Don't get me wrong...I am going to miss camp. I already miss it. And unlike the past years when I was able to hang on knowing that in a few weeks I would be at training, this year I have to keep reminding myself that the void that comes from a lack of camp in my life isn't going to be filled this summer...at least not in the same way. My desire is to continue to keep up with the lives of my sweet little kiddos through facebook and the occasional visits. Of course I'll see all the great pictures John always uploads throughout the days in the summer and miss being there. And I'm sure I'll have a meltdown...or two...knowing that I'm missing out on all the fun and the sweet relationships that are being built. But I KNOW that camp will be awesome this year, as always, and that lives will be changed! And while I won't physically be there, camp will always be dear to my heart and something I pray for regularly.

So...this is my little update on life, my summer plans, and why I won't be at camp for those of you who have been wondering. For all of you who will be returning, both counselors and campers, I'll miss you all so much but will also be praying that you have a WONDERFUL time! :)

Well it's spring break!! Yeaaaa! :) I got home last night and have already been shopping with mom and am having a good break. However, I still had a little bit of homework to do; a team project that's due tonight in one of my online classes.

This week our team was given a scenario with a crisis between two companies and told that our PR firm was called in to handle the crisis. We were given some specifics about the two companies and some guidelines and have to turn in a report of how we would carry out crisis response. As I've been sitting here working on it I realized how much I LOVE what I'm doing in school!! Even this morning I had someone ask me about school and was just saying that I have loved this semester more than any other probably, simply because I'm actually enjoying my school work.

It's so crazy to look back over all the things I've talked about doing from my 10-year-old days of wanting to open a "flower shop", to my 15-year-old days of wanting to be a marine biologist at Sea World, to thinking I wanted to be an Occupational Therapist my senior year of high school, and now here I am studying Public Relations and LOVING it! It just makes me so happy when I think about how worried I was going into college and even just last year when I wasn't really enjoying my major and thinking that I was doing all this work to end up with a job I didn't really like all that much and now knowing I've finally found something that is not only a great fit for me, but something I really believe I can excel in!

This girl, who doesn't like to read, was just thinking how excited I am to have this break to catch up and actually read through my PR book more thoroughly than I have been able to while I've been at school! How does that happen?! I don't know, but what I do know is that I am so thankful that God finally brought me to this place and gave me some reassurance for why I'm in school. I never thought I would be a working girl. Always just wanted to settle down and have a family. And while I definitely want a family some day, I now have this new found desire to work and to travel and to enjoy life doing something I really like and am good at!

Random little post, but I just got a burst of excitement and wanted to jot these thoughts down to remember someday! :)

A Little Recap

It's been a little while since my last post, but I'm going to try to pick this back up. I thought I'd share a couple of highlights from the year so far!

First of all, John Michael's birthday was January 14th. He turned 13....he's getting SO old! Well back in probably October I heard that Rascal Flatts were coming to Little Rock in February, along with Hunter Hayes and Sara Evans. Rascal Flatts has always been a common bond between the two of us. I've loved them since I can remember and somewhere along the way I got John Michael hooked on them too and he literally bought me a CD of theirs every Christmas or birthday (I'm convinced for his benefit as much as mine! haha.) until I owned them all. So naturally, when I heard that they were coming I knew I couldn't miss the opportunity to spend a night at one of their concerts with him!

Because I went back to school January 11th, I gave him the tickets a little bit early. I wrapped them in a Victoria's Secret sack...his response when I handed it to him was, "Really??! You had to wrap it in THIS?!" Bahaha. Such a funny sister! :) I had gotten him all hyped up over this gift the weeks before, mentioning that I had never spent this much money on any of my siblings' birthday presents before and that it was gonna be his best gift ever and little comments like that along the way so it was a much anticipated gift! When he finally opened them he was so confused at first, then he realized what they were and said "Umm....is this what I think it is?!"

The night of the concert we drove through McDonalds (his choice) for dinner on the way. When we got to the door they scanned our tickets and told us we needed to go to the box office. I was getting a little worried that something was wrong with the tickets, but when we got to the box office we were pleasantly surprised to hear that our seats had been upgraded from the upper bowl to the third row on the lower row on the second closest section to the stage!! Then our good friend Mr. Brad got us into the Dog Pound and we were able to get some pretty cool pictures as well as touch all of the band members hands!! Pretty cool "first concert" for him! :) We had a wonderful time and it was a blessing to get to spend that evening with my first little brother!

Another little adventure from the year is that we got some snow a couple weeks ago! And snow during the school year is always an exciting thing. The anticipation of getting a day off kills us. We sit by the tv watching the names of schools scroll across the bottom while checking our school email and facebook every five minutes...or maybe every two? haha. This year wasn't any less exciting than all the others have been! haha.

It kinda came at a bad time because I'd been sick and wasn't quite over it and by the time we got up and got out to play in it, it was sleeting. So the combination of cold, snow, wind, sleet, and a cough probably wasn't the greatest for me, but it was all worth it for the 20 minutes of fun we got, sledding with friends! :)

These girls are some of my very best friends here!! Both new and old friends, they have blessed my life and I'm so thankful for each one of them. These freshman girls have already found a very special place in my heart and we've bonded quickly over 3 a.m. doughnuts, Bachelor watching parties on Monday nights, lunch in the caf, driving around singing in the car, and snow days! And I can't say enough how thankful I am for Tori, Rachel, and Kiwi who have been there since freshman year! Oh...and I can't forget Jilliann...she was playing with Ruthie (her little sister) on this day so she didn't make the picture, but I love her too! ;) haha.

This year has started off great and I can't wait to see what the rest of it brings! I know that awesome adventures and new chapters in life are ahead of me! Eeeeek! :)

Inspired

Wow...it's been a long time since my last post! As much as I love to blog, it really is something I am not very consistent at. It comes and goes with the different seasons of my life depending, especially on how busy I am.

This morning, however, I find myself blessed with the much needed "chill time" that comes with Christmas break. I have spent a good part of the week simply staying home and enjoying crafting, cooking, and spending time with family and friends. Around the holidays I always immerse myself in recipes and cooking, spending hours pouring over cookbooks and watching The Food Network (the TV in my room literally never changes channels unless the boys go down there to watch something).

I was particularly inspired this morning when I woke up and saw Ree Drummond on my TV! "ho is Ree Drummond?" you ask. ONLY MY SINGLE MOST FAVORITE PERSON IN THE COOKING INDUSTRY!!!!! lol. Ok...so I realize I might be a little over excited, but I literally jumped out of bed, ran into the family room, and said, "Mom!! The Pioneer Woman has a show on Food Network and she's on right now!!" She said, "Yeah, I think I knew that?"....not nearly as excited as I was but laughing a little bit at me, still in my t-shirt and sweats, with messy hair and sleepy eyes, jumping around in excitement. So needless to say, it was a good way to wake up! :)

I then sat, glued to the TV until the show ended...and yes...sadly, it did end. But no worries, I went straight to her website and have spend the last hour and half reading recipes and looking at her photography and just pouring over her life a little bit. haha. When I was home over Thanksgiving break, I actually re-read her cookbook "The Pioneer Woman" (which I had already read twice before) and made a few of her recipes...LOVE her cinnamon roll recipe!

It seems that over the holidays I always seem to get re-inspired in the kitchen! I never lose my love for cooking, but cooking with minimal ingredients and tools in a small apartment kitchen isn't quite as fun as being home where the supplies seem unlimited compared to my tiny few at school and I rarely get stuck needing something I don't have! Last year I made Christmas dinner and this year I wouldn't pass up that opportunity to do it again! I've been thinking and planning the meal all week and today is the day that I get to make the final grocery list for mom to get all my ingredients! :) I'm pretty excited to be back in the kitchen, where I'm happiest and can't wait to share picture of the finished Christmas dinner tomorrow night!

Constant

This word "constant" keeps repeating itself in my mind and in my heart this afternoon. I'm sitting at a table under an oning at the lake and it is raining. It's not pouring, but it's a constant, steady rain. The lake is peaceful today. Everything here is still and quiet. The sky gray and the air is cool, but with no breeze, just the stillness and quiet trickle of raindrops.

My hear needed to be here this afternoon. I needed this stillness and tranquility. School is wonderful and I truly love it. And for anyone who knows me well, you know I love to go, go, go, and keep going till I drop! But every now and then, I need to stop and just breathe.

Sitting here listening to the rain and my ipod quietly playing a few of my favorite worship songs has been a blessing and encouragement. The song "Constant" by Charlie Hall just finished playing. The lyrics say,

Just like the sunshine, you have been our light

Leading us into beautiful places

And we've walked through fire but You made us brighter
Leading us into beautiful places

Faithful Jesus, healing Savior

Compass center, bread of life

Faithful Jesus, cherished treasure

Our portion, wisdom, God's great light

Just like the starlight You shine in the black night

Leading us into beautiful places

Just like the atmosphere You've come to surround us here

Leading us into beautiful places

Faithful Jesus, healing Savior

Compass center, bread of life
Faithful Jesus, cherished treasure

Our portion, wisdom, God's great light

God, You are here with us, constantly here with us

You are our everything, faithful and true

God, You are here with us, constantly here with us

You are our everything, faithful and true

It was a sweet reminder that Jesus is with us in everything. He is walking through life with me, holding my hand, and carrying me when I fall. He is faithful and true. It was a blessing to be reminded this afternoon that as constant as this rain is that is falling from the sky, so is my God! Thank you Precious Father!

Always Faithful

This morning I opened my devotional book and this is what I read...

"The morning watch is essential. You must not face the day until you have faced God, nor look into the face of others until you have looked into His.

You cannot expect to be victorious if the day begins only in your own strength. Face the work of every day with your heart and God. Do not meet other people, even those of your own home, until you have first met the great Guest and honored Companion of your life--Jesus Christ.

Meet Him alone. Meet Him regularly. Meet Him with His open Book of counsel before you; and face the regular and irregular duties of each day with the influence of His personality definitely controlling your every act."

Wow! Good thing I've been trying to fix every problem and conquer every mountain on my own weak strength! Hmm...kinda explains why I've been FAILING!!! Gosh, God is SO good to smack me in the face and say "Hey! I've been trying to tell you this all along...but you aren't listening so I guess I'll just have to show you!" And yep..He showed me! He knows just what I need and He is always faithful to bring it into my life right when I need it.

I have been reminded this morning of God's faithfulness. That word......FAITHFUL....just keeps being laid on my heart. Even when I am not, He is. He never stops pursuing me even when I stop pursing Him. He never stops loving me, even when I stop loving Him. He is always faithful. I have never left His hand. I may not have remembered it, but He's been holding me all along. Today is a new day. Today is the beginning of a new week. And I will conquer it, not because I am strong, but because He who lives in me is strong!