Mother Teresa

Someone once shared with me a piece of paper with a bunch of Mother Teresa quotes. I fell in love with these and wrote them down in my journal so I would always be able to go back and re-read them. I was reading through my journal last night and stumbled across them and thought I would share them. I hope they encourage, challenge, motivate, convict, and bless you the way they have for me! Enjoy! :)

"If you judge people, you have no time to love them."

"One filled with joy preaches without preaching."

"Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless."

"Violence of the tongu is very real--sharper than any knife."

"To keep a lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in it."

"Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person."

"It just takes one day. Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not come. We have only today to love Jesus."

"God hasn't called me to be successful. He's called me to be faithful."

"I am like a little pencil in God's hand. He does the writing. The pencil has nothing to do with it."

"Smile at each other, smile at your wife, smile at your husband, smile at your children, smile at each other--it doesn't matter who it is and that will help you to grow up in greater love for each other."

--Mother Teresa

I'm Not Who I Was

"I found us in a photograph

I saw me and I had to laugh

You know, I'm not who I was...

I write about love and such

Maybe cuz I want it so much

I'm not who I was...

Well the thing I find so amazing

In amazing grace is the chance to give it out

Maybe that's what love is all about

I wish you could see me now

I wish I could show you how

I'm not who I was"

When I left for Passion 2011 in Ft. Worth, Texas last weekend I was a different person than the person I am now. The Katie Magnus that returned to Russellville isn't the same Katie Magnus that left. How could I be after all the teaching, worshipping, praying, thinking, evaluating, growing, sharing, crying, and just having my heart completely pounded in general?? God has moved in my heart like never before.

When Francis Chan spoke he talked about this "moment" you have where God just moves in you and you feel different. Generally it is when you become a believer, but for me that moment came this weekend. I've been saved since I was in 4th grade but I have never had that moment of "Oh my goodness, my Savior died for ME! My sins were the nails that were pounded into His hands. My evil heart hung Him on that cross! And He has poured His undeserved grace and lavished His never-ending love on my life!!"......until this weekend!

I went to Passion knowing that I needed to change...knowing that my heart had grow cold and hardened to my Jesus....knowing that I was headed down the path that leads to destruction. But I had no idea that God would tear my heart to peices the way that He did this weekend. I was blessed to hear God speak through Louie Giglio, Francis Chan, and John Piper and to worship with true worshippers--Chris Tomlin, Charlie Hall, Christy Nockles, Kristian Stanfill, David Crowder, and Lecrae. All of these people I have mentioned have devoted their lives to carrying the name of Jesus and the do it with utmost humility. They don't demand introductions or applause from others. They stood up on the stage not preaching at us or singing to us, but preaching to themselves as well and worshipping along with us! It was such a blessing to see such humility and passion for Jesus and His people!

My heart was completely torn apart and utterly broken for the unreached people groups of this world that I didn't even realize existed!! So many people have never even heard the name of Jesus and have no access to a Bible in their native language. And here I sit in my comfortable dorm room in Russellville, Arkansas with plenty of food to eat, clothes to wear, school that's paid for, and more crap than I will EVER need but I seem to think that I can't live without! I couldn't stop tears from pouring down my face as I watched videos of the Koso people in Mali, Africa talk about the road to Jesus and how they were telling everyone they knew about Jesus and this new found hope and chance for life forever with Jesus. And then seeing a 7 year old Hatian girl named Therissa who lost her mom, her sister, and one of her arms in the earthquakes standing on the stage right there in Ft. Worth smiling because we were able to help give her a prosthetic arm and a college fund.......Jesus brought me to my knees.......literally.

I have so much that I want to share but for now this is just a little taste of where God's brought me so far. My passion right now is carrying the name of Jesus across the Arkansas Tech campus. My heart is broken for the lost and suffering people in this world, but right now God has me in Russellville. So my mission field is the lost and suffering people here --students, professors, cleaning ladies, the Doc's ladies, caf workers, and whoever else He brings me into contact with.

On our way home from passion the girls and I were talking about how and where to start when we got back. We all agreed on the importance of prayer: praying for the people we need to reach and for strength and courage for ourselves as Satan tries to break us down. So we have started a prayer movement that we're calling "11:11". It kinda came from the idea of "11:11! Make a wish!" We just decided that instead of "making a wish" at 11:11 we wanted to pray for this campus. So for the past two nights there has been a group that has met on the balcony on the third floor of the library and we have prayed together. The first night it was just 6 girls and 1 guy. Then last night we had 18 people!! God is already answering prayers!! It was so encouraging both nights to come together at the end of our day and pray with other believers with the same passion and desire to reach the people of Arkansas Tech and to know that we are not alone in this. To hear everyone's voiced lifted to heaven pleading for the salvation of our classmates and professors, was unlike anything I've ever felt. It was just one of many reminders of God's goodness to provide "the church"....not the actual building...but the people of Christ coming together for one purpose and one desire.

Please be in prayer for this movement!! We are only human and taking time to go there every night may be great and encouraging now, but there will be days when we don't feel like it or we are busy or when we feel like we are losing that passion. We have no strength on our own. It comes only from God!! So pray that God will continue to grow this movement and use us how He pleases. Pray that people will look past us and see straight to Him!

To God be the glory!!

Days Like These

Well, this girl is back from a week at the beach and more than ready for some warm weather in Arkansas now! :) I spent five days in Destin with four of my best friends from school! We had a blast. The sun was shining and the water was a perfect turquoise. It was hard to leave the beautiul sunny Florida, but I'm back and so thankful that I got to go.

Days Like These

Jason Aldean

Ain't no cloud up in my sky

I couldn't worry if I tried

I got an open road just air and me

To pick you up and take you for a ride

I got a new shine on my car.

Sun is tannin' my left arm

And while I'm waitin' on the red light

I'm burnin' up a little air guitar

Turn it up a little bit louder

Turn it up I love this sound

Come on girl the world is ours

Let's do somethin' right or wrong

Life is short

Let's go live it

Ain't no time for wastin' time

Days like these they go by way too fast

Days like these you wanna make 'em last

Rest your feet up on the dash

Leave your toe prints on the glass

Sing it like you mean it baby

Close your eyes and lay your head on back

Turn it up a little bit louder

Turn it up I love this song

Come on girl the world is ours

Let's do somethin' right or wrong

Life is short

Let's go live it

Ain't no time for wastin' time

Days like these they go by way too fast

Days like these you wanna make 'em last

Speakers layin' in the truck bed

No this day ain't done yet

'Till the sun goes down

Turn it up a little bit louder

Turn it up I love this song

Come on girl the world is ours

Let's do somethin' right or wrong

Life is short

Let's go live it

Ain't no time for wastin' time

Days like these they go by way too fast

Days like these you wanna make 'em last

Beautiful Exchange

I don't really have much to say. Just watch this video. Jesus has broken my heart today over my sin and the ugliness of my heart and this song makes me cry every time. Jesus' death on the cross is such a beautiful exchange and it should bring me to my knees in humility daily.

http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-bUZj1bkoE

Storms

"When He got into the boat, His disciples followed Him. And behold, there arose a great storm on the sea, so that the boat was being covered with the waves; but Jesus Himself was asleep. And they came to Him and woke Him, saying, 'Save us, Lord; we are perishing!' He said to them, 'Why are you afraid, you men of little faith?' Then He got up and rebuked the winds and the sea, and it became perfectly calm. The men were amazed, and said, 'What kind of a man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey Him?'"

Matthew 8:23-27

This week we studied this passage in our Flame leaders meeting. It's a very familiar passage to me. I've heard it taught countless times since I was little. For some reason it just really impacted me this week. In the past I've read this story and just thought that it was demonstrating God's power and control over this earth. I've only ever thought of it in regards to physical storms. But this week, it hit me that not only does God demonstrate His might and power through calming physical storms; He also calms the "storms" and struggles that we go through in life.

I am just like the disciples saying "Save us, Lord; we are perishing!" The parallel to this story is in Mark 4. In verse 38 they said, "Teacher, do You not care that we are perishing?" This year has had it's fill of storms in my life. Not just things that have happened but also just storms and battles within my heart. I've struggled with doubt, worry, and fear. Before college I never would have used any of those words to define my life. EVER!! I "had it all together" in high school...or I thought I did anyway. So I came here thinking that I was fully capable of making it on my own. But I was so very wrong. I am not capable of anything without my Savior. I didn't realize that I was trying to make it on my own until this week though. So I, just like the disciples, have been wondering why God didn't care that I was failing over and over again and barely keeping my head above the water.

That's just the point though. It's not about me keeping my head above the water. It's not about me trying to survive through the storm. It's about trusting my Savior who controls the storm. He is trying to teach me something through all that happens in my life just like He was teaching the disciples to put their trust in Him. I've been so busy trying to calm the storms on my own that I forgot to look to my Savior who holds not only my life, but all the storms in his hands!

These words keep ringing in my head....."Why are you afraid, you men of little faith?"

On top of that lesson I've been obsessed with the song "Believe" by Hillsong United. We sang it last week in Fuel and I couldn't hold back the tears as I was reminded that God is strong even in my weakness.

"You are my light.

You are my strength.

You are my Rock.

On you I stand.

I lift my voice.

I raise my hands.

I lift my soul with all I am.

In Christ forever I'll stand.

I will believe.

You are strong enough.

In my weakness, God be lifted up.

And I will sing.

Lift Your praises high.

Lord, be magnified.

You make all things new.

I will believe.

So hear this song.

Receive our praise.

You are our strength for all our days.

We lift you up.

Our voices high.

In every storm let God arise.

In Christ forever I'll stand.

I will believe.

You are strong enough.

In my weakness, God be lifted up.

And I will sing.

Lift Your praises high.

Lord, be magnified.

You make all things new.

I will believe."

I've had a few friends do this, so of course, I felt the need to do it too! :)

Ten things I wish I could say to ten different people:
1. You have taught me more than I realized. Sometimes I don't understand your reasons behind doing or saying certain things, but looking back I can see how God has used you in my life. You will never know how much you mean to me.
2. Your passion for Jesus and spreading his gospel and his love to everyone you come in contact with inspires me. I've seen you cry simply because you just desire for others to know the love of Jesus that has been poured over you and it was truly touching.
3. My heart hurts for you. I see you hurting yourself and just wish I could stop you. I pray for you almost daily and hope that the Lord will use me in your life. I love you.
4. Recently we've gotten closer and it's been a blessing to my heart. You are a dear friend and your eagerness to dig into the Word and learn more has convicted and motivated me to be more excited about it too!
5. Sometimes I think you're too hard on yourself. You don't realize what a blessing you are to others and how much God uses you in the lives of those around you. You think you've failed in so many areas, but God uses us most when we are weak. I know He has used you in my life in more ways than you will EVER know!
6. You are the one person that God used the most to show me how off track I had gotten last semester. You weren't afraid to tell me what I needed to hear and I'm thankful for your loving boldness.
7. You are teaching me to be selfless. I often have to give up time, money, and my desires for you and it has grown me more in these past two years than I could ever have imagined. I think God has placed you in my life to prepare me to be a great mom someday. Thank you!
8. I miss you. You were one of my best friends and I miss seeing you every day. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time but I know this is where God has us both for a reason. You will always have a special place in my heart. I'll never forget you.
9. It's crazy how things can change so much in 10+ years. Thinking back on the days when we were little brings sweet memories to my mind, but it also places painful aches in my heart for you. I pray that God will put someone in your life to help you on this dangerous path you're going down. I'm scared for you.
10. You all captured my heart in just 10 days and I've never had all of it back since then. I wish more than anything that I could see you again, but I know that I might not ever get to this side of heaven. However, I also know that one day we will meet again, and what a happy day it will be! My heart is so happy when I think about your sweet testimonies that you are to your families. I love you more than you may ever know!

Nine things about myself:
1. I love kids more than I know how to express!!
2. I hate making decisions. I'm so bad at it.
3. I love to take pictures and be in them. I want to always capture every memory.
4. I've never been on a date. Not a single one. Ever. (P.S.--I'm 20 years old!!)
5. I could sing all day long and never get tired of it. I'm passionate about it.
6. If I could be in Jerez, Mexico right now I would be.
7. I love Camp Solgohachia!
8. I hate to fail or let people down more than just about anything.
9. I love shoes!! I would wear the same clothes every day if I could just have different shoes!

Eight ways to win my heart:
1. Bring me flowers--daisies, yellow roses, and sunflowers.
2. Love kids!
3. Write me notes--long or short, doesn't matter.
4. Talk to me. Just be honest. I need to know when I've upset you, as well as when you just can't stop smiling because of something you love about me.
5. Care about the things that mean the most to me. You don't have to love them like I do, just care about them because I do.
6. Be so focused on Jesus that He has to bring us together when we least expect it because you're too busy seeking Him to be seeking me.
7. Take the time to get to know and love my friends and family. They are so important to me and if you can't love them, I can't love you.
8. Be respectful to your mother, learn from your father, take care of your sisters, and be your brothers' best friend!

Seven things that cross my mind a lot:
1. How people view me--Do I display Jesus?
2. Friends and family who are stumbling down the wrong path.
3. Camp
4. Mexico
5. Everything I need to do better but never actually change.
6. Rayden
7. My future--husband, job, and kids.

Six things I do before I fall asleep:
1. Put chap stick and lotion on.
2. Turn my fan on high.
3. Pray.
4. Plug my phone in.
5. Turn on the TV--and the sleep timer.
6. Lock my door.

Five songs I listen to often:
1. You're Great Name-Natalie Grant
2. Dirt Road Anthem-Jason Aldean
3. Bleeding Love-Leona Lewis
4. Move If You Wanna--MIMS
5. Free Fallin'-John Mayer

Four things you're wearing right now:
1. Nike sweat pants
2. Razorback t-shirt
3. Tech sweatshirt
4. Red polka dot underwear

Three people that mean a lot to you (in no specific order):
1. Krista
2. My grandparents
3. Tracy Cochran

Two things you want to do before you die:
1. Go back to Jerez
2. Have a family

One confession:
1. I'm afraid of commitment. I'm scared to trust and be let down.

His Hands

For the past few weeks my heart has been burdened over what the Lord wants to use me for this summer. I have been blessed with two wonderful opportunities and no idea which one I should take! I've been invited to go back to Camp Solgohachia this summer to serve as a part of the full time summer staff and I have also been invited to be a part of a discipleship program here in Russellville called Vintage.

I worked at camp all summer last year and part time the two years before that. It's been a part of so many of my summers. God has used it in my life to teach me so much. I've formed sweet friendships there both with the kids and their leaders and also with the staff I've been blessed to work with. This camp holds a special place in my heart. It's a baby camp. It's not like War Eagle and Kanakuk. It's a much smaller scale camp and I love that about it because you really get to form deep and close relationships with the kids. But to me, it also takes hand picked people to work there because it's not gonna have the biggest pool or the most activites or the most high tech worship services. It's a little more old school. And I LOVE that about it!! It really brings out the "Jesus" in camp because you are surrounded by His creation and there are so many opportunities to talk and grow with the kids. My heart longs to be there and if I could spend my whole year there I would! I love it!!

Then there's Vintage. This is a discipleship program led by Mark Palfreeman, our college pastor at First Baptist Church of Russellville. Students who do Vintage will live in a hotel in Russellville for the month of June and then in the church for the part of July that we are here. During the day we can work or take classes at Tech and each night we have a different event. Sundays we have worship and Evangelism Training. Monday night is prayer night. Tuesday night we have inductive Bible study training. Wednesday nights are potluck and teaching/worship. Thursdays we have small group bible studies. Friday nights are free and Saturdays are a day to rest and revamp for the week. And then, in the middle of July we will be taking a mission trip. We have the option of going to Toronto or Kenya. I thought about doing this last summer but had already committed to camp and just couldn't even think about not going. So this summer I was really thinking about doing it, but I'm having a hard time tearing my heart away from camp.

So I would covet your prayers as I'm seeking what the Lord would have me do this summer and how He would have me serve Him. I know that neither choice will be a bad one. They are both wonderful opportunities, but at this point I don't know where I should be. So please pray with me! :)