To My Future Husband

Tonight Laura and I made "To My Future Husband" boxes!! Well....hers didn't really turn out how she wanted so she took the supplies home to make hers later but I finished mine and I LOVE it!!!!! I'm so so excited and I just couldn't wait to take picture of it and get them up on here to share! :)

What exactly is a "To My Future Husband" box, you might ask?! It is a box just for my perfect man (whom I may or may not have met yet...I actually don't know who he is! lol.) that I hope to marry someday in the (hopefully near-ish) future! :) I want to fill it with thoughts about how I'm growing as a girl who's always aspired to be a "Proverbs 31 Woman", thoughts on what I hope he will be like, how I hope to be treated, things I fear about marriage, ideas that I think would be fun for dates or vacations, verses or quotes or poems or songs, funny things that happen to me, and whatever else I can think of that I want to share with my future husband someday! I want to give him the box after our wedding and go through it with him. I guess it's just a way for me to be able to put these things down on paper when they come to me. I love to blog (obviously!), journal, write....anything that allows me to be able to see my feelings, thoughts, and ideas on paper! And I'm reeeally big on memories and pictures and things that enable me to, in a way, capture or bottle up time and keep it as a memory! I just think it will be a neat thing to be able to share with my husband someday and see how God brought certain events together or caused certain things to happen to bring the two of us together.....kinda my journey and story of how God brought me to my man!!! :)

(Side note: I'm not saying that I know for sure that I will get married someday! Yes, I hope to! Yes, I want to! I want to meet a man that I love dearly and can spend the rest of my life. I want to have kids..LOTS of them actually!! :] I want all of that and I'm praying for it, but it may not be what God has for me. So in a way this is a "hope box", but if I do get married I know I will be so happy to be able to share this with "him". So I figured I might as well!! Just needed to explain that this whole blog post is based on a "Lord willing"....as everything should be....I've become more and more sensitive to that recently, especially after this whole India thing!)

Now, back to the box.....Here are my pictures!!! Enjoy!!! :)

He Knows Best

Well.....when I left my house at 11:00 this morning I was prepared for God to show me His ways and teach me according to His will and His plan. He did! Just not in the way that I thought He would. According to our plan we should have checked our bags in at 11:50. According to our plan we should have boarded the plane not too long ago. According to our plan our flight should be taking off in four minutes. According to our plan we should be heading to India RIGHT NOW! But....not according to God's plan!

This morning India announced a terrorist alert. Apparently last night four terrorists from Pakistan entered into India and have made threats to attack major tourist cities on New Years Eve. Goa is one of those major cities. On the way to the airport we got a phone call and I found out that Laura's parents were pulling her from the trip. Her dad is an FBI agent and said it wasn't safe. So we thought, as we were 10 minutes from the airport, that I was about to have to make a decision about whether or not I was going to go. I didn't know what to do. I've had a nervous feeling about this trip in my stomach all morning. I just figured it was because it's my first international trip and I hate flying and all that jazz. So I didn't think much of it other than, "I'm going on this trip because this is what God has for me and I need to trust Him with my fears. He is in control, not me." And that's what I was doing. I got to the airport not knowing exactly what I was going to do, but thinking I would have to make the decision soon. Pastor Murray walked up a few minutes later without his suitcases and said the trip was cancelled. They talked to Mr. Mitchell about all the details and at first we were going to make our own decisions individually and see who all still wanted to go. But the elders of our church talked about it and we talked with the P's (the family in India that is from our church) and the elders decided it was best to call the trip off. It was a hard decision, but it's not necessarily being there that is so dangerous as much as just the travelling aspect of it.

I'm sad not to be going. I was definitely looking forward to it and getting excited about it. But at the same time I know God knows best and His plan is the best for me. He has a reason for all of this happening and it is in His mighty hands. The saddest part for me is thinking of all the families that we don't get to minister to anymore. It's sad to think about their disappointment when they find out we aren't coming and for the P's who I know were so looking forward to seeing part of their church family. Pray for them as they are still hosting this conference without us. Pray for strength and understanding and trust for them. Pray that it will still be a time of encouragement for all the families and that they will still be able to minister to and encourage each other. Pray for the hearts of our team members as we stay here and trust that we made the right decision. Pray for the hearts of the terrorists and the people who are stirring up trouble. Pray that God will protect the people in Goa and the other big cities that are being targeted. Pray that even though we hope this was a wise decision, that nothing will actually happen! I don't know what God's plan is in all of this. I don't know why He would have this happen. But I do know that He is good and He loves us and cares for us.

"For we know that all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purposes."

--Romans 8:28

All Packed!

I'm all packed up and ready to go!! I've spent the morning double and triple checking to make sure everything is together and I have all the important things. My suitcase weighed in at 43.8 pounds! Yeah baby!!! Mom is at Walgreens buying me one last thing and then heading here to pick us up! Sweet time with Callie and my family last night has made leaving today a bittersweet thing, but I'm excited to see what God has for me on this trip. Last semester was a hard one for me. I went through some hard stuff and just felt far from God in general. I didn't spend enough time in the word or in prayer. And I failed to stop and just listen to what God had to say to me. Over the break I have realized more and more how little I turned to Him over the past few months and how much it affected my life. I'm looking forward to these 12 days with no cell phone, very little internet, and only a couple of close friends with me. I'm praying that God takes this heart of mine and melts it with an overwhelming love and desire for Him and a realization that true satisfaction is found in Him alone. I'm praying that He "breaks my heart for what breaks His" and that He takes my selfishness and turns it into selfLESSness that I may be a part of furthering HIS kingdom and encouraging His disciples. Pray for safety and strength as we travel and even while we're there and that we will be used up for Him!! See you all when I get back, Lord willing!! :)

Almost, Almost, Almost

I am allllllmmmmooooossssttt PACKED!!!! :)))) Yay for being SO close to finishing this daunting task that has taken me all last night and most of this day simply because I get too distracted (possibly on purpose :P) or frustrated!! lol. I reeeeally do hate to pack! :) The shopping might have been worse though. Really close call! haha. Nnnnnnyway, I took a little break from that to eat dinner with the fam, then went to walmart to purchase ice cream (for sundays later) and iTuuuuuuunes cards so I could get movies for the plane! Upon returning from Wally World I proceeded to spend my iTunes money on Dear John, The Proposal, and The Parent Trap (the one with LL of course!). All favorites of mine that I cannot wait to watch over and over again! haha. Then..I tried to go back to packing and...made a little more progress? I think anyway...

Then came the wondeful WONDERFUL fun stuff! Cal came over and we played Boxers or Briefs with the fam! If you've never had the opportunity to play this game you HAVE to!! It really is a MUST PLAY! I love it so so much. At one point Stephen cracked up and we laughed till we cried. Great fun! Then we ended the night with Bluebell ice cream and homemade hot fudge sundays (I made the fudge btw..I'm getting pretty good at making that stuff if I do say so myself!) lol. It was a delightful last night at home before "the end of Christmas break". And now I'm baking some last minute chocolate chip oatmeal cookies (my FAVORITE) to put away in my carry-on for safe keeping and an emergency snack break! :) Yes yes yes...couldn't resist! haha. Cal is spending the night and we plan to play a little Just Dance 2 later! It shall be a jolly good time! Got a loooooooong way to go before my night is over! ;) I shall try to post once more in the morning (or maybe even again tonight)! But for now.........hasta luego!! (That's "talk to you later" in Spanish for anyone who doesn't know!)

Exciting Purchases

Well, my mom and I just spent HOURS shopping!! Ugh...I hate shopping when I have to buy stuff. I only like it when I have plenty of money to spend and I can buy what I want!! lol. But anyway...we made progress and got everything I need--animal crackers, protein bars, propel, travel toothbrush and toothpaste, pants, a neck pillow and eye mask for traveling--you know, the important things! haha. So now that I have everything I need to pack all I have to do is make it all fit into the suitcase along with my clothes and such and make sure it's under 50 pounds! Here goes nothing.........

The Sun is Up and So Am I!

Of course...the day I'm trying to sleep as late as I possibly can I'm wide awake at 9:00 and can't go back to sleep. I have a million and four things to do though so I guess it's a good thing. I can get up and be productive now...nah, why would I do that when I can waste time viewing everyone that I've ever met's profile on facebook?! Ok, sounds good to me! So..that's what I've done for the past thirty minutes that I've just been laying here in bed. Figured I should take this time to blog...

Look at my two little cuties (that's Theo and Beks btw, if you didn't catch that)! Aren't they precious!! They have been my faithful companions at night these past few weeks! They both stayed up with me to pack last night. Well....about the time I was finishing up I looked over to find Bekah asleep sitting up in the director's chair. It was kinda adorable actually. Man..I should've taken a picture! Oh well, too late now. Anyway, Beks said last night "You know what stinks is that you're staying up late because you're supposed to get used to it and I'm staying up with you. But the difference is that you get to sleep in tomorrow and mom's gonna make me get up!" But she stayed up anyway and look how cute she is now sleeping next to me! :) It's 9:39 now and mom hasn't come to wake her up yet so the "precious boo baby" is still getting some beauty sleep! And of course she doesn't know I took the picture or that I'm blogging about her! But she will soon enough!! **Muahahahahaha** (That's supposed to be an evil laugh in case you didn't pick up on that) No really though, she reads my blog so that's how I know she'll see this. lol. Love you Beks! ;)

And the other little guy on the left...that's my Theo! :) He used to belong to my bestest friend Callie Beth. I've always loooved him and she got a new bear last year (Brady) so she used to bring both of them whenever we were spending the night together and she'd sleep with Brady and I'd sleep with Theo. We love them! :) I think she actually left him at camp for me this summer after she spent a week there. And then she told me when she went to school that I could keep him as long as I would take good care of him! I love him and mostly I just love that whenever I reeeeally miss Cal I give him a little sqeeze and remember her and all our sweet times together until I can get a REAL hug from her! :) He's my little buddy...

Anywhoo....just wanted to post this cute picture of my little babies. They're kinda adorable and I wanted to share them with everyone who reads this! hehe.

And so it begins.....

Operation "Get Used to India Time" is officially in progress! lol. It's 1:59 am in Little Rock, AR and it's approximately 1:29 pm in Goa, India! :) So.....considering the fact that I'm pretty tired and completely brain dead from trying to pack I don't really think I'm gonna make it even to late afternoon "Goa time". But I'm at least making a little bit of progress! Made it over "halfway through the day". haha. And I'm planning on sleeping as late as my body will let me tomorrow. We'll see how that goes. Then I have to get up, pack some more, make a trip or two to walmart and a couple of other places, come back home and pack some more, and try to stay up even later tomorrow night! Then it will finally be the big day!! And I know it will come all too soon because I still have a million and one things to do to be ready! But it's so close and I'm getting more and more excited about this wonderful privilege I've been given!! I have so much to say and so much running through my mind, but I'm to tired to make sense of any of it so maybe tomorrow? haha. We'll just see how the day goes. I'm sure I'll need a packing break right?! But for now, this girl is done with this packing business and moving on to BED!!!!!!

Just Call Me Rachel Ray

SUCCESSSSSSS!!!!!!! :) My first attempt at Christmas dinner turned out beautifully! It all came out on time (and at the same time), it tasted good, we had enough, basically.....it couldn't have gone better! I'm thrilled! The only one thing that kinda brought me down was when I was broiling the creme brulee tonight I accidentally touched the hot brown sugar and burned my finger BAD!! :-( The hot sugar stuck to my finger and I wiped it off quickly, but it still left a little blister. Other than that though everthing went well! It was fun and mom said her day was pretty easy and she thinks we should make this a regular tradition from now on! Guess we'll see next year! Sounds good to me! :)

P.S.--My pics aren't uploading right now so I'll get them up tomorrow hopefully!

Progress

The table is set...properly I might add!! haha. I googled how to "properly" set a dinner table and since I talked mom into buying sparkling grape juice we don't just have water goblets, we also have wine goblets for the grape juice! :) I'm pretty excited about it!! Brisket is in the oven. The rolls are rising. The mushrooms are stuffed. The green beans are bundled. The salad ingredients are chopped. The dishwasher is being unloaded. And everything is on schedule to be finished at approximately 6:40! So far, my first attempt at Christmas dinner is going well. Hopefully things keep running smoothly! :)

Christmas Dinner

This year I asked mom if I could take on the responsibility of making our family Christmas dinner. We do our Christmas dinner and open presents on the 23rd and then have Santa stockings the morning of the 24th. So I began the dinner making process yesterday. What's on the menu this year?--Martha's brisket, green bean bundles, Mrs. Wenger's BSF salad, Miss Ramona's stuffed mushrooms, mashed potatos, Nanee's homemade rolls, and for dessert--Martha's creme brulee (chocolate AND vanilla)!!! And I am pretty darn excited!! lol. So, yesterday I made the creme brulee, prepped the brisket so it could marinate overnight, coated the almonds in sugar (for the salad), and made my dressing. Everyone keeps telling me, "The more you can do the day before the easier your life will be the next day!" So I did! Now, I'm in the process of starting the rolls so they can rise for a little while. Making the stuffing for the mushrooms and stuffing them. And chopping my salad ingredients. So far I've had a lot of fun and I'm looking forward to the rest of this day! I'm even going to set the table and I'm trying to talk someone into getting sparkling grape juice just so we can use wine glasses because they're fun! haha. Anyway, gotta get back to cooking, but I'll keep updating on my progress! :) I'm sure I'll add pics of the finished products later tonight as well!

Breathing Again

Well.....it's been FOREVER since my last post! That of course, means life has been crazy busy! But I'm FINALLY home for Christmas break and so so so thankful to be able to stop, sit down, and just breathe.... It really is so nice! This has been one crazy semester! A good one, but a crazy one. I've been through a lot, struggled a lot, messed up a lot, learned a lot, and grown a lot. And I am so thankful for it all. Every day hasn't been easy; in fact, a lot of days have been really hard.

But God has brought me through each and every situation and taught me so much!

As I reflect back on this semester I know the whole thing was a whirlwind. I felt like I was strapped to a highspeed train and couldn't get off. I've disappointed people, made bad grades on tests, stayed up to late, studied too little, played too hard, spent too much money, and everything else that a college student can easily make mistakes on--but I've learned from it all! Part of why I've been so ready to be home is because I am just so worn out from all the stresses of school and relationships. And all semester I wished it all away! I wanted the stress and struggles out of my life! I didn't want to deal with them. But looking back on it I know God has been teaching me through it and drawing me closer to him. He has taken friendships out of my life, changed some of them, and blessed me with new ones. And the best part of it is that it's all part of HIS plan and not MINE! He knows what's best for my life and He has taken care of me. I've spent this semester trying to "just get by" and trying even harder to please everyone.......and I have failed. I can't always make everyone happy. And that's a big thing He has taught me! On my own I am completely helpless and thankfully, when I try to do it on my own He is right there to pick me up when I fall and remind me that He is there with open arms to carry me through the hard times. My God is so good and I couldn't be more thankful that He loves me and takes care of me even when I neglect to thank Him or even ask Him for help in the first place!! What a great Savior I serve!!

Kids, Camp, and Just Joy!

Today I'm thankful for camp!! I was looking back over pictures from the summer and it made me miss it soooo much!! Committing my summer to working with kids week after week was one of the best decisions I've ever made! It was an incredible blessing to be able to touch so many different lives in just a few months. It's so easy with kids because for the most part they just want someone to listen to them, play with them, and genuinely love and care for them. And that's what I had the privilege of doing this summer!

Kids would come (usually for a week) and as counselors, it was our job to put our cell phones up, ignore everything else that was going on in our lives for a little while, and make sure these kids knew that we were there for them and they were our number one priority. Some people thought it was crazy to spend my whole summer getting paid way under minimum wage, where cell phone service was pretty bad, and I didn't have any time to visit friends from school, but I would do it all over again in a heartbeat!

I spent my weekdays trudging in the mud trying to pull stuck kids out of a kayak in the pond, yelling "Make sure your safety is on while you cock the gun.", painting faces for our Monday night carnivals, trying to explain how to get an arrow in a hay bale but not being able to successfully demonstrate it, getting pushed into the pool fully dressed (multiple times!), catching lizards, killing snakes, pulling catfish off of hooks, staying up late brainstorming ideas of things to do on rainy days, getting up early to sing songs at 8:00 on hot mornings in the sun, teaching finger-knitting, singing "Do everything without complaining" over.....and over......and over again, and getting told "You're the best counselor ever!" followed by a hug!!!

(Yes I know that was just one giant run-on sentence....I don't really care though! lol. )

It was the BEST summer of my 19 years so far!! I wouldn't trade it for the world!! I am so thankful that I got to spend my summer loving kids! I will never forget any of the precious kids that I met this summer. They all hold a special place in my heart.

Family

I've been sitting in the library slowly chipping away at my HUGE block of homework and I decided it was time for a "blog break"! :)

Today I'm thankful for family. I have been incredibly blessed to grow up in a wonderful loving family. My parents have been happily married for almost 22 years. I have two younger sisters and two younger brothers who have become some of my very best friends. And of course I can't forget our precious puppies! Well....Will might be five now, but he will still ALWAYS be my puppy! :)

My parents have always worked hard to make our house a home and a place where we felt loved and cared for and they have done a great job. I know that I can always turn to them when I need prayers, advice, love, a good meal (always important to a college student!), a place to sleep, and really just anything!! It's something I've taken for granted. I guess since I've always had that I just assume everyone's life is the same way, but it has actually become a rare thing in today's world! And today I want to stop and take the time to say how very thankful I am for what I have been given!

And not only do I have wonderful parents, but precious siblings!! Of course we have our little (and BIG) squabbles, but we really do love each other! :) My sisters have become some of my closest friends. I usually get a text from at least one of them each day asking how I'm doing or how they can be praying for me. They do such a great job of keeping up with my crazy life even when I fail to keep up with theirs! I know I can trust them with anything and I can even turn to them for advice....I don't think wisdom necessarily has to come with age. Sometimes it amazes me how wise they are!! It's quite humbling actually!

And then there are the boys........oh goodness, where to begin?! lol. They are CrAzzZzyY!!! lol. And I love them for it!! We have so much fun together! Just last weekend I was home and I had the great privilege of chasing Stephen around the house and out the front door singing Justin Bieber songs while he ran away screaming "Make it stop! Make it stop!" Then as I followed him outside he circled around, ran back in the house and locked me out. Thankfully, monkey-man John Michael was watching from up in a tree and he hopped down ran through the garage and let me back in! haha. Then I put aside my love for JB long enough to play Band Hero with them for a while. We have formed a quite impressive trio that we like to call "The JKS Band"--JMM on drums, me on guitar, and Stephen as our lead singer. I'm convinced we could sing "Living on a Prayer" all day long!! They are a mess, but they are MY messes and I love every little messy bit of them!!!! :)

God is good to give us family and whether your family is like mine or different He has given us family to shape us and make us who we are today. They are in our lives for a reason. Stop and thank Him for them today!

The Cross

I honestly don't have the time in my day to blog today, but throughout this weekend and this morning I have been reminded of the cross and all that it means to me and that's what I'm thankful for today. I'm thankful that God sent His perfect Son to die a shameful, excruciating, and humiliting death to destroy the nasty, filthy, discusting sin in my life!!! Praise Jesus that I am free from the burden of sin forever!

"When I survey the wondrous cross

On which the Prince of Glory died

My richest gain I count but loss

And pour contempt on all my pride."

Memories

Today I'm thankful for memories. It's just been one of those days of thinking back on things and all the good and bad times I've been through. God has helped me through hard times and blessed me with good times and all of those times have played a part in shaping who I am today. I AM THANKFUL FOR YOU!

Rehab Science, Disney Music, and Movie Nights

Today, I have three things that have come to my mind that I'm especially thankful for so I'm just going to post about all of them! The first thing I'm thankful for is something I've been praying for direction for for a looooong time--A MAJOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) Yes, it's shocking, I know...but I have FINALLY decided on a major--Rehabilitation Science with a concentration in Child Welfare! I went to the Revenue office and declared today! Couldn't feel more relieved! I'm super excited about it!

The second thing I'm thankful for is DISSSSSSSSNEY music!!!!! :) Ahhhh!! I love it so much!! Today I was messing around on iTunes and discovered a list of 100 Top Movie Songs. I started listening to them and then had to start an "Aladdin Radio" on Pandora! My afternoon has consisted of Peter Pan, Aladdin, Mulan, Beauty and the Beast, Tarzan, The Lion King, Mary Poppins, and lots more! And it has been wonderful! :) I love Disney movies.....reminds me of when I was little and I love it! Funny how one little song can carry so many sweet memories with it.

And last but definitely NOT least, I am thankful for movie nights with friends!! These past few weeks have been absolutely non-stop for me! They haven't been bad, just busy. So, tonight I (along with a few of the girls) have decided I'm taking a break from everything and we are going to watch a movie, eat some popcorn, and just stay in our dorm for some chill time! I don't have any homework tonight and I've already spent some time in the library getting things done for my trip to India (which, by the way, I need to blog about soon!). It has been a fairly productive day and now I'm ready for some wonderful down time before another busy day tomorrow!!

So, in conclusion, tonight I am thanking my sweet Jesus for my new major, Disney music (and the childhood memories that come with it), and a much needed movie night with my wonderful friends!! God is good! Take the time to stop and thank Him for the blessings in your life! Even amidst hard times He is ALWAYS good and I know there has to be at least one good thing in your life you can thank Him for! So stop and do it! :) Happy Tuesday night!!!

Thankfulness

Well, Halloween is over and Thanksgiving is coming up in just a few weeks! Thanksgiving has always been one of those holidays that I sort-of overlook. Christmas is definitely a favorite of mine. I LOVE everything about Christmas and all the traditions that come with it! So naturally, I'm usually pretty quick to get the decorations out (yes, even here at school I do plenty of decorating!) and blare Christmas music from my room. But this year, I've decided to change that.

Thanksgiving is important. We are commanded to "be thankful" in Colossians 3:15, and I know it's something that I really struggle with! I'm quick to ask for things, but often fail to thank Him for all He has blessed me with! So this year, I have resolved to be more thankful! I'm going to try to blog every day from now until Thanksgiving about something I am thankful for. Obviously, I'm super busy so this might not happen every day, but it's going to be my goal! :) So here's the first one!

Today, I am thankful that I got to spend last week in Omaha, NE at volleyball nationals! I left Russellville on Wednesday afternoon with my friend, Hannah Dancy, and one of Claire's friends, Emily Helm and we began our 8 hour drive to Omaha! We made good time with only two bathroom breaks (a major record for me!! lol.) and got there by about 10:30 Wednesday night. We spent lots of time watching volleyball and just being with each other in the hotel lobby at night and got to do a little shopping Saturday morning. We left yesterday morning at 7:20 and Hannah and I surprised Rachel, Tori, and Jilliann by being back by 4:00 to watch Rachel and Jilliann's 3 on 3 basketball game! It was a lot of driving in a short amount of time, but it was worth it! I'm thankful that I was able to spend that much time with my family, watch Rebekah and Claire's last few games of volleyball, and spend time with Kiwi that we don't usually get at school! It was a wonderful five days and now that it's over I'm REALLY thankful to be back in this beautiful town called Russellville, AR!!! :)

Loving You is Easy

"To the world you may be just one person, but to one person you may be the world."

God has given me such wonderful friends here! I really can't say enough how much they mean to me and how thankful I am for them!!! It's funny how quickly I've grown to love these people, but when you see each other every day and go through funny, hard, and crazy times together it just brings you close quickly. It has been a blessing to have each and every one of them in my life and I don't know what I'd do without them!

Bow the Knee

Isaiah 26:3

"The steadfast of mind You will keep in perfect peace, because He trusts in You."

1 Peter 5:7

"Casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you."

How wonderful that our God is in control and that we can trust Him and know His plan is perfect? He knows our lives and our hearts. He knows what we are struggling through. In fact, He has placed every struggle in our life. And on top of that, He will help us through them all. He is faithful...always!

Numbers 23:19

"God is not a man, that He should lie, nor a son of man, that He should repent; He has said, and will He not do it? Or has He spoken, and will He not make it good?"

Lamentations 3:2-3

"The LORD's lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness."

Isaiah 41:10

"Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

The lyrics from the song "Bow the Knee" popped into my head today and I have been thinking about them and so encouraged by them all day. So, I thought I would share them.

There are moments on our journey following the Lord

Where God illumines every step we take.

There are times when circumstances make perfect sense to us,

as we try to understand each move He makes.
When the path grows dim and our questions have no answers, turn to Him.

Bow the knee

Trust the heart of your Father when the answer goes beyond what you can see

Bow the knee

Lift your eyes toward heaven and believe the One who holds eternity

When you don't understand the purpose of His plan,

In the presence of the King, bow the knee

There are days when clouds surround us, and the rain begins to fall,

The cold and lonely winds won't cease to blow.

And there seems to be no reason for the sufferings we feel;

We are tempted to believe God doesn't know.

When the storms arise, don't forget we live by faith and not by sight

"Bearing With One Another"

Colossians 3:12-14

"Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility ,meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive and above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony."

We studied these verses this past Sunday in Flame and God has brought them back to my mind and laid them on my heart over and over again this week. Paul just packed SO much into these three little verses! The first thing that stuck out to me was how he calls us "God's chosen ones". What a privilege! We are scum! We don't even deserve to live and not only does God give us that but on top of that he calls us his "chosen ones"! What an honor! But it's not just an honor; it's also a responsibility. When we bear Christ's name we are responsible for our actions and ultimately all that we do reflects back on to His holy and perfect name.

With that said, we are commanded to put on "compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another" and we are to "forgive and above all these put on love". I don't know about you, but to me that's a little bit overwhelming! I struggle to even follow one of those commandments in a day let alone all of them! But that is how we are called to live.

All of these commandments hit me hard, but one that especially stood out to me was where he says, "bearing with one another". Generally when I think of this phrase I think of patience and just kinda "sticking it out" with someone even if they annoy you or you are struggling to have a good attitude towards them. And that may be the case sometimes, but one one of the girls in the group talked about it in a different perspective that I had never thought about and it really got me thinking about it and God has been bringing it up in my life this week. Dictionary.com defines the word "to bear" this way:

bear: 1. to hold up; support 2. to hold or remain firm under 6. to press or push against 7. to hold or carry 9. to suffer; endure; undergo

So really, this is telling us that we are to hold each other up and to support each other. We are to help each other remain firm. We are to help each other press or push against struggles and hard times. We are to help hold or carry others. We are to suffer, endure, or undergo hardships alongside others. What a great privilege and responsibility. God is telling us that we are supposed to be there for each other. When someone is struggling it is our job to pick them up and help them through that situation. God knew we would go through hardships and sufferings here on this earth and he has given us friends and family so that we can come alongside each other and not have to bear these things alone! So who in your life needs someone to "bear with them"? Who have you failed to life up? Stop and take the time to really ask how someone is doing and sincerely mean it and take the time to listen to their answer. And then don't just stop there..."bear with them"!

Are you too comfortable?

"Life is comfortable when you separate yourself from people who are different from you. That epitomizes what my life was like: characterized by comfort. But God doesn't call us to be comfortable. He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn't come through."

--Crazy Love

This has been a constant struggle in my life and something that God continually brings to my attention! It is so easy to just hang out with friends from church or the BCM or Wesley all the time because it's comfortable. It's not comfortable to meet new people who maybe don't like doing the same things I like to do or people who have a different lifestyle than me or people who don't know Jesus or chose not to believe in Him. It's much easier to live out my faith and stand up for what I believe when I know that everyone I'm with believes the same thing. But a candle doesn't stand out in a room that's already lit! In order for my light to shine for Jesus and for me to be an example for Him I need to go where it's darkest! Where people can't see and where they need that light. That dark room is different for everyone. For you it may be another state or country. It may be the place where you work. It may be your family! For me, it's this campus and this wonderful school that God has placed me in. He has given me opportunity after opportunity and person after person to witness to and now it's up to me to decide if I'm going to go to that dark place and take my light with me and let it shine! Think about it!! :)

Rebel!

The other day, Laura and I went to study in the library and Hooper was in there so we decided to sit and study with her. She had brought a little snack of mini oreos and we just couldn't resist when she kindly offered to share. Nevermind that there were signs on EVERY table saying "no food or drink in the library". We just wanted a little snack...so we had one! And of course someone would see us and tell us that we couldn't have that in there! haha. Just felt the need to post about my little moment of rebellion! :)

Just the Way You Are

It's been a busy past few weeks and my blogging has obviously been the first thing to get pushed aside, but I thought I'd give a little update of what's been going on in my life this semester.

Age to Age:

I've jumped right back into Age to Age this semester. For those of you who don't know, it's a mentoring program for impoverished kids in the Russellville area, through The Wesley Foundation. It was a big part of why I chose ATU and mentoring has been one of the best experiences of my life! This is my precious Rayden! I started out with her last year in her first year of "Older Age to Age" (5th-7th grade). She's 6th grade now and goodness has she grown since last semester! She came to Skate Night with make-up on and her hair straightened, looking older than ever!! We have grown so much closer already just in these past few weeks. She's like a little sister to me. Monday after Age to Age I took her to eat with me at the caf along with Taylor and Renee and their girls Tamara and Ashley and I felt like a proud big sister walking in there with her! I loved everything about having her there with me! We are two peas in a pod. Anyone you ask who knows both of us will tell you that you couldn't have picked a better kid or mentor for either of us! This Sunday she is going to go to church with me and I couldn't be more excited!!! Pray that God opens up opportunities!

The Lake:

Lake Dardanelle State Park has become a regular part of my week! This time of year I want to be outside as much as possible!! We have had gorgeous weather these past few weeks and I am loving every bit of it! The park isn't very far from school so I go there by myself for devotionals or studying or with friends for picnics and hanging out. Ususally something eventful happens! lol. We always have a good time though! It's the perfect hang out spot and I'm so glad it's close by!

Brown Town:
Ohhhhh Brown Town! lol. What is "Brown Town" you may ask? It is a lovely boys dorm that smells...interesting to say the least...and is the residing place of quite a few of my best friends here at school! :) Many afternoons, evenings, and weekends have been spent there studying, watching movies, playing Call of Duty (or watching the guys play), Skyping, taking funny pictures, and COLORING!! :) haha. I'm convinced that our walls will be completely covered by the end of the year from all the pictures we've drawn! haha.

I have lots more I could share and I would love to on another day!! But this post is getting kinda long and I've got to go do some Spanish homework (story of my life! lol.) So for now, I will end with a quote from one of my favorite movies--"Up":

"Adventure is out there!!!" :)

God, Grant Me Patience!

Recently, God has been teaching me a lot about patience. I'm most definitely not a patient person by nature. I do think I have gotten a lot more patient than I used to be, but it has taken a looong time to even get this far. When I get something in my head that I want to do or something that I think would be fun or would be good I want it to happen right away! I get so excited about it and make all these plans and I can easily have the next five years of my life planned out in just 10 minutes! haha. My thought process is random, scattered, and super fast! lol. But a lot of times I think about things without really thinking through them. And usually, it doesn't work out so well that way. :) So, in these past few days I've really been thinking about how I need to work on that. God already has my next five years planned out (if He chooses to give me five more years on this earth) and however many years may come after that, as well! So, I don't need to worry about what tomorrow will be like or how long I may have to wait for something. He already knows and His plan is WAY more perfect than mine could ever be! What a great comfort that is!

In Love With the Savior

If you haven't noticed, a lot of my posts have been about sharing the gospel and being passionate about it and living out what we say we believe. It has definitely been on my heart. But there's a new thought that God's put in my heart recently. Why is it so hard to make sharing the gospel a regular thing? Why do I have to try so hard to make it a part of my day or to even remember to do it? If we truly love Christ as our Lord and Savior for what He has done for us shouldn't we want to talk about it all of the time?

Francis Chan says, " When you are truly in love, you go to great lengths to be with the one you love. You'll drive for hours to be together, even if it's only for a short while. You don't mind staying up late to talk. Walking in the rain is romantic, not annoying. You'll willingly spend a small fortune on the one you're crazy about. When you are apart from each other, it's painful, even miserable. He or she is all you think about; you jump at any chance to be together."

That really hit me hard! I should be deeply in love with Christ! When you are deeply in love with someone (not that I speak from experience) you want to be with them all the time. And when you aren't with them you think about them all the time. And you want to tell all your friends and the people around you about that person and how much they mean to you. You want to write them letters and talk to them. You want to hear what they have to say. God loves us deeply and wants to be with us, but do we return that love and that desire to be with Him always? That love and that passion comes from getting to know Him and the sacrifice He made for us. The more time you spend with someone that is special to you the more you come to love them. The more you learn about someone and the more you get to know their heart, the more they mean to you. God is the same way!!! I know it isn't hard for me to spend time with my family and friends. I love them and want to be them as often as possible. I want to know them inside and out. I want to tell everyone about them and what they mean to me. So why am I not that way with Christ? I'm spending more time in His Word each day and more time talking with Him and the more I do those things the more I want to do those things! I'm learning to fall in love with my Savior!

God's Greatness

"Who has directed the Spirit of the LORD, or as His counselor has informed Him? With whom did He consult and who gave Him understand? And who taught Him in the path of justice and taught Him knowledge and informed Him of the way of understanding?" --Isaiah 40 :13-14

"To whom then will you liken God? Or what likeness will you compare with Him?" --Isaiah 40:18

"It is He who sits above the circle of the earth, and its inhabitants are like grasshoppers, who stretches out the heavens like a curtain and spreads them out like a tent to dwell in. He it is who reduces rulers to nothing, who makes the judges of the eart meaningless." --Isaiah 40:22-23

"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Everlasting God, the LORD, the Creator of the ends of the earth does not become weary or tired. His understanding is inscrutable. He gives strength to the weary, and to him who lacks might He increases power. Though youths grow weary and tired, and vigorous young men stumble badly, yet those who wait for the LORD will gain new strangth; they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary." --Isaiah 40:28-31

Lukewarm?

It's been a while since my last post, because I've just had so much going on, but I have TONS to share so hopefully I'll get back into the swing of things this week! I'm still reading Crazy Love and I just started going to a bible study on Sunday nights called Flame where we are going through Colossians and learning how to be small group leaders. So I've got a bunch of different things on my mind, but I will try my hardest to condense them into one main thought...or maybe a couple of main thoughts. :)



First of all, Crazy Love! The last chapter I read was about being a lukewarm Christian. In otherwards, saying you are a Christian, but not really living like you are one. And by that, I don't mean, that you say you're a Christian but you smart off to your parents or gossip about someone. I mean, you call yourself a Christian and maybe you are a "good person" and you even go to Bible studies and do the "extra" stuff, but do your really live passionately for Christ? Do you have this fire burning inside of you? This deep desire to share the wonderful love displayed on the cross with everyone you see! Do you live with the constant understanding of how we absolutely do NOT deserve the precious grace that our Savior has lavished upon us? Do you have a heart that is deeply burdened for the lost and for those who don't know this great love? That's what I mean, by not being a lukewarm Christian! We should be utterly amazed and in awe of our Savior and His love for us and equally discusted with the filth of this earth that we live in!

My heart has been so heavily burdened these past few weeks! I have been going from one thing to the next and loving my life, but at the same time I always go to bed feeling unfullfilled. I lay down and think, "I did everything I was supposed to do today and I even had time to hang out with friends and have fun, but I don't feel satisfied." And God finally hit me on the head and said, "Hello Katie! I'm right here!! You're trying so hard to be everywhere and do everything and never 'miss out' on anything that you're missing the whole point of life! It's me!!!" I know this sounds simple and it's something I've heard my whole life! But hearing it and believing it are two completely different things!! And I've just been hearing it.

In the book, Francis Chan gives a "Profile of the Lukewarm". I was SO convicted by it!! So I've decided to share it! :) Maybe not all of these things characterize you, but I know for sure that many of them characterize me. Here they are:

LUKEWARM PEOPLE...

1. Attend church fairly regularly. It is what is expected of them, what they believe "good Christians" do, so they go.

2. Give money to charity and to the church...as long as it doesn't impinge on their standard of living.

3. Tend to choose what is popular over what is right when they are in conflict. They desire to fit in both at church and outside of church; they care more about what people thing of their actions ( like church attendance and giving) than what God thinks of their hearts and lives.

4. Don't really want to be saved from their sin; they want only to be saved from the penalty of their sin. They don't genuinely hate sin and aren't truly sorry for it; they are merely sorry because God is going to punish them.

5. Are moved by stories about people who do radical things for Christ, yet they do not act. They assume such action is for "extreme" Christians, not average ones. Lukewarm people call "radical" what Jesus expected of all His followers.

6. Rarely share their faith with their neighbors, coworkers, or friends. They do not want to be rejected, nor do they want to make people uncomfortable by talking about private issues like religion.

7. Gauge their morality or "goodness" by comparing themselves to the secular world. They feel satisfied that while they aren't as hard-core for Jesus as so-and-so, they are nowhere as horrible as they guy down the street.

8. Say they love Jesus, and He is, indeed, a part of their lives. But only a part. They give Him a section of their time, their money, and their thoughts, but He isn't allowed to control their lives.

9. Love God, but they do not love Him with all their heart, soul, and strength. They would be quick to assure you that they try to love God that much, but that sort of total devotion isn't really possible for the average person; it's only for pastors and missionaries and radicals.

10. Love others but do not seek to love others as much as they love themselves. Their love of others is typically focused on those who love them in return, like family, friends, and other people they know and connect with.

11. Will serve God and others, but there are limits to how far they will go or how much time, money, and energy they are willing to give.

12. Think about life on earth much more often than eternity in heaven. Daily life is mostly focused on today's to-do list, this week's schedule, and next month's vacation. Rarely, if ever, do they intently consider the life to come.

13. Are thankful for their luxuries and comforts, and rarely consider trying to give as much as possible to the poor.

14. Do whatever is necessary to keep themselves from feeling too guilty. They want to do the bare minimum, to be "good enough" without it requiring too much of them.

15. Are continually concerned with playing it safe; they are slaves to the god of control. This focus on safe living keeps them from sacrificing and risking for God.

16. Feel secure because they attend church, made a profession of faith at age twelve, were baptized, come from a Christian family, vote Republican, or live in America. Just as the prophets in the Old Testament warned Israel that they were not safe just because they lived in the land of Israel, so we are not safe just because we wear the label Christian or because some people persist in calling us a "Christian nation".

17. Do not live by faith; their lives are structured so they never have to.

18. Probably drink and swear less than average, but besides that, they really aren't very different from your typical unbeliever. They equate their partially sanitized lives with holiness, but they couldn't be more wrong.



I know, I know...it's a lot to take in right?! I was slightly overwhelmed when I read all of that (and there's way more detail in the book so you should read it!), but at the same time it was much needed in my life! I hope that it was as rude of an awakening for you as it was for me!! But now...I must go to class! So I shall post more later. So much more that I want to share, but not enough time! Plus, I'm thinking it's better to do it piece by piece...kinda have to peel back everything that's crammed in my brain one layer at a time. haha. Have a wonderful afternoon and don't forget to ask yourself--Are you lukewarm?

All For Him

"Intellectually we all know that we will die, but we do not really know it in the sense that the knowledge becomes a part of us. We do not really know it in the sense of living as though it were true. On the contrary, we tend to live as though our lives would go on forever."

--Frederick Buechner

Today I ready chapter two of Crazy Love. The title of this chapter is "You Might Not Finish This Chapter"....comforting right?! Well, let me just warn you...comforting isn't exactly the first thing that came to my mind as I read this chapter! haha. Not to say that it isn't comforting to know that God is bigger than us...BUT the word that I think better describes this chapter is "humbling".

Francis Chan challenges the readers of this chapter to consider how we go through our days making plans and how we live each day. Do you wake up in the morning and think, "This could be my last day on this earth!" or "This could be my last chance to tell someone I love them." or "This could be the last opportunity I have to share the love of Jesus with those who I come in contact with."? I know that definitely isn't my habit! I usually wake up and think, first of all, "I don't want to be awake." Then I think, "Shoot! Did I do all of my homework for today?!"...then, "Wonder what I'm gonna wear today...since I didn't do laundry yesterday I guess I'll be wearing the last pair of clean shorts and whatever t-shirt I can find that maybe semi-matches..." Then, I get out of bed and start rummaging through my clothes looking for anything that even remotely goes together and still looks and smells clean." After picking something out I hurry to brush my teeth, put my hair into a messy bun, grab my backpack, and rush off to class, often in not the best of moods because the last thing I want to be doing is sitting in a desk listening to a 70-year-old man talk about World Literature.

What a great start to my day, right?! NO!! I almost always start my day out thinking of myself, whether that may be what I'm going to wear or what all I have to do that day or who I'm going to go to lunch with! There is so much more to life than these small, insignificant details that I often spend so much time worrying about. And ultimately it is a waste of my time because I may spend an hour trying to figure out how to even begin my Spanish paper and for all I know I might not be alive to turn it in the next day! I know that sounds kinda morbid, but it's the truth! We have not been promised any amount of time on this earth! And even if we live a long life of 90 years are these minuscule things really going to matter in the grand scheme of things? No, they aren't. (Not saying that school isn't important..we should do it to God's glory, but ultimately it's not worth stressing over.)

WARNING: THIS NEXT QUOTE FROM THE BOOK JUST ABOUT KNOCKED THE BREATH OUT OF ME...YEAH, IT'S THAT CONVICTING!!! (Don't say I didn't warn you. lol.)

"I used to believe that in this world there are two kinds of people: natural worriers and naturally joyful people. I couldn't really help it that I was the worrying kind. I'm a problem solver, so I have to focus on things that need fixing. God can see that my intensity and anxiety are ministry related. I worry because I take His work seriously. Right? But then there's that perplexing command: 'Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!' (Phil 4:4). You'll notice that it doesn't end with '...unless you're doing something extremely important.' No, it's a command for all of us, and it follows with the charge, 'Do not be anxious about anything' (v. 6). That came as a pretty staggering realization. But what I realized next was even more staggering. When I am consumed by my problems--stressed out about my life, my family, my job--I actually convey the belief that I think the circumstances are more important than God's command to always rejoice. In other words, that I have a 'right' to disobey God because of the magnitude of my responsibilities." (Told ya it was convicting!!!)

He then gives the example of being an extra in a movie. Say I'm in the movie for two fifths of a second and you see the back of my head and I get all excited and just want everyone to watch this movie with me in it! How ridiculous would that be? It's not even a big part of the movie and doesn't really have anything to do with the main idea or story line. It's just one little part used to make the movie and the director could have used the back of anyones head. It didn't have to be my head! I live my life like that person in the movie. My life is a vapor, two fifths of a second, in this movie of life and I act like it's such a big deal! I make my priorities, desires, and needs of great importance and put myself first so often. But this is God's earth. I am His vessel. My life belongs to Him and should be devoted to bringing Him glory!

Then he continues to ask the question "Are you ready?" You don't know when you're life will end. You don't know how much time God has given you. You could be living your last few minutes right now. We never know when God may choose to take our life from us. So are you ready? Have to made a difference on this earth? Have your shared Jesus with those who need to know about Him? Have you lived like someone who loves Jesus and made that love evident to those around you? If you were to die today what would be said at your funeral tomorrow? This life is short. Even if you live to be 100 years old, in the grand scheme of life 100 years is like a vapor that disappears in the wind. Don't take this life for granted! Stop and think about what you're doing with your life. Is it bringing glory to our Great and Mighty God? Think about it!

I want to leave you with the last two little paragraphs in this chapter. "A friend of mine has a particularly wise perspective on this subject. He was asked if he weren't spending too much of his time serving and giving too much away. His gentle but honest response was, 'I wonder if you'll say that after we're dead.' Friends, we need to stop living selfish lives, forgetful of our God. Our lives here are short, often unexpectedly so, and we can all stand to be reminded of it from time to time. That's why I wrote this chapter, to help us remember that in the movie of life, nothing matters except our King and God. Don't let yourself forget. Soak it in and keep remember that it is true. He is everything."

The Perfect Weekend

This weekend I got to go back to camp for Labor Day Family Camp! It was PERFECT!! God blessed us with beautiful weather! The sun was out and shining each day, making it just right for swimming and the slip n' slide, but not too hot for the zipline and scream swing. And then at night it would cool off with a light breeze, making it just right for family games and devotions around the bonfire. God really did give us the ultimate weather for the weekend!

Some things happened and plans changed and we got there and really didn't have enough staff. We made it work, but it was tight and people were running around like crazy trying to be everywhere at once and get everything done that needed to be done. God really provided though. Nothing critical was left undone and we had the important things covered. And most importantly we were able to love on the kids and hopefully all the parents had an encouraging time too!

It was a much needed blessing to get to spend time with the kids after two weeks at school! Life here is busy and I'm always with people my age. Not that I don't LOVE my friends! Because I most definitely do!! But...kids are my favorite! They put a smile on my face and a happy feeling in my heart! And when I'm here I don't get to spend all that much time with kids, so getting to have a weekend at camp, with kids I love was the best thing that God could have allowed me to do on such a lovely holiday weekend! We rotated which groups we worked with so I got to spend time with the 5 and under group and all the cute "little ones" and then I got to hang out with the 6 and older group too. They're all so fun and it was laid out really well so that I was able to do both.

And then, of course, there's all the staff there that I love! Chef Adam and all the kitchen crew, Miss Bobby, Lori....I loved seeing all of them! I always go to camp with the mindset that I'm giong to share Jesus with the kids, but God quickly reminds me that there are others there who need to know His love too! I have really grown to love Kirstie and Tiffany, two of the girls who work in the kitchen, and it was SUCH a blessing to get to talk with them a little bit! I've missed them a TON!!

Oh! And I got to help lead worship one night morning! Not that I sounded great or anything, cuz my voice was barely there, but it was still fun! I always love any opportunity I get to help lead others in worship!

So basically, this weekend was filled with everything I love so much--my family, sweet kids, camp (and everyone who works there), good worship, beautiful weather, and time with my Great God!! I miss it already, but it was a wonderful time of being refreshed, encouraged, and reminded of what I'm passionate about! Now I'm ready to hit this campus hard and make a lasting impact!! Pray, pray, pray as Jesus moves here!

"Crazy Time"

So, the other day I was in Taylor's room and we were just talking and I looked over and saw "Crazy Love" sitting on her bookshelf. I commented on how I had never read it before and she said it was a must read and let me borrow it. Tori also had the book but hadn't read it yet and when I said I was going to read it she got excited and said "Oh Katiebug! Let's read it together and then talk about it! We can call it 'Crazy Time'!!" So....two days ago, I began reading the book that has already started to change my life! I think I'm in for a loooong ride with this one! :) So here goes the first of many posts about what I'm learning, I'm sure!



I started with the preface thinking I would just get an overview of what the book was going to be about, but not expecting to really get into it yet. I was WAY wrong about that! lol. I was only on the second or third page when I came to this..."The core problem isn't the fact that we're lukewarm, halfhearted, or stagnant Christians. The crux of it all is why we are this way, and it is because we have an inaccurate view of God. We see Him as a benevolent Being who is satisfied when people manage to fit Him into their lives in some small way. We forget that God never had an identity crisis. He knows that He's great and deserves to be the center of our lives. Jesus came humbly as a servant, but He never begs us to give Him some small part of ourselves. He commands everything from His followers." So....are you as blown away as I was?? lol.



After reading this I realized that I have this view of God. I think I'm doing something good when I sit down and spend 30 minutes reading His Word or talking to Him or even just listening to Him. But why do I think that 30 minutes out of 24 hours in a day is enough? Why do I think that God is so pleased with me when I do that? That's not to say that God isn't pleased when we take time to spend with Him, but why should I have to stop and make a conscious effort to spend time with Him? If Christ is my Savior I should be living, breathing, and doing everything completely centered around Him! Everything I do should be for His glory! And I should include Him in every aspect of my life. Whether I'm praying for the people I pass on the sidewalk as I walk to class or just consciously thinking of how I can serve or bless those around me. He is always with me and I was put on this earth to bring Him glory and that is what I am praying that He will teach me and help me to do! So..that's my thought for the day! Hope you're convicted and encouraged! :)

Free Fallin'

A short Skype conversation the other day stirred up something in me and I just felt the need to write about it. Last year, through circumstances that I didn't understand or like at first, God brought one of my best friends into my life. He blessed me with the wonderful opportunity to room with Evan Tubbs!!! :) We really didn't know each other very well, but I got to move into 301B in Nutt Hall with her a few weeks into my freshman year! And, not to sound cheesy, but that was our start to a beautiful friendship! haha.

Evan and I went through a lot together last year. I think I can speak for both of when I say that God knew that we needed each other and He was so gracious to pair us up the way He did. We have so many memories together--some funny, some sweet, and some just plain random! lol. When I first came to school I was shy, unwilling to break out of my shell, and miserable. But you can only be shy for so long with Evan around! haha. She makes things so fun and she was so good to make me go places and get me to do stuff that I wouldn't have done before. She's a big part of that change in me and how I love to meet new people and try new things now!

Also, we discovered that we share a love for a few of our favorite things and people!! One of those people being our dear John Mayer, of course!! Oh yes!! We loooooove our John! How could we not?! He sings our theme song from last year--Free Fallin'! :) And then there's our "Noonday song" by Train, "Hey, Soul Sister"! We always had to listen to this as we made our way through the crazy lunch hour traffic just to get across the street to the BCM. Not really sure why we never walked, but we always had fun riding over there together! Oh, and Evan has a hidden talent!She's a crazy awesome rapper! lol. She wrote a couple about Taylor and me one late night during finals week and recorded them so we won't ever forget them. Those are the nights I miss the most...just chillin' in our room, being weird, talking about the most random things, running to Walmart for "a date night with our two favorite guys, Ben and Jerry", watching "The Newleyweds" before bed, having snowballs thrown THROUGH our open window, standing on the beds singing and dancing, cutting the guys' hair, drinking "little hugs", almost killling ourselves as we tried to get up on Evan's lofted bed, doing our dancing workout video, fighting over a certain sweatshirt ;), baking in the kitchen downstairs, and talking for hours before bed! We made so many great memories last year and I will miss that so much this year!! But I am so thankful for last year and that God allowed us to become roommates and best friends! I looooooove you Evan Tubbs!! :)

More Than Survivors

This summer God blessed me with the awesome opportunity to work as a camp counselor at Camp Solgohachia in Solgohachia, AR. I got there the last week of May for two weeks of training and then camp started on June 7th with our first group from El Dorado. They were precious!! I couldn't have asked for a better group to start the summer out with! The kids touched my heart and I am convinced I was more blessed by them than they were by me! They were so open with us and I was amazed and encouraged by the willingness of some of the girls to share their hearts and their struggles with all of us counselors. It was a great start to the summer!!

Change

So...my family just left for Kansas City and I'm at home finishing up my packing and getting ready to head to Russellville tomorrow. My mom's been busy all day getting everything they needed ready for the tournament and she just got home about two hours ago. I've been home packing so we haven't seen each other much. She walked by about 30 minutes ago and said "Can you tell I'm pretending you aren't leaving for college again?!" I just laughed. Well, she and the boys just left to pick up Claire and my dad and head to KC. First my brothers came in, hugged me and said "See ya in two weeks!" (sweet, but not a big deal..we only live and hour and 15 minutes from each other!). Then...my mom came in and....surprise, surprise....she cried! "I just don't like this! I don't like not having you home! I'm glad you love it and I would really hate it if you didn't but it's just sad that you're leaving!" Lol. I'm glad to be loved and it makes me happy that I'm missed and I DO love being home and I WILL miss my family! BUT...Tech is where I'm supposed to be right now and I couldn't be more ready to get back up there!

So...why am I posting about and where am I headed with this?! I guess my little moment with my mom just made me think back over this last year and about where I was this time last year. I was the one crying!! Of course she was too, but I was BAWLING!! Like a baby!! lol. In fact I cried myself to sleep every night for the first two weeks of school! I hated not being in Little Rock with my family and friends. I hated not really knowing anyone at Tech. I hated having to meet new people, go to new classes, have a new schedule, live in a new town...I hated change.

I guess to some degree I still don't love change, but I've learned to not only accept it, but to embrace it! I think that God puts change in our lives so that we don't get too comfortable. Not saying that God wants us to be uncomfortable, but I know that for me, change always takes me back to Him! When I was miserable those first two weeks and I didn't know anyone, God was my Rock. He was my best friend. He was the one thing that was constant in my life! No matter what changed--my home, my friends, my food, my bed--God stayed the same!

Going to college last year and leaving everything familiar to me was hard, but God brought me through it and taught me SO much!! I couldn't be more thankful for the people He's brought into my life and the hard times He's brought me though and the great opportunities I've been given! So I guess my main thought here would be that change may be hard and seem like and obstacle at the time, but look to Christ in the situation and what it is that He's trying to do. And you may not be able to see His plan at the moment, but know that He does have one and it's WAY better than any plan of ours could EVER be!! :)

BEACH!!!

This summer has been filled with adventures which will take me many posts to tell about, but my most recent adventure was a trip to the beach with Laura Mitchell, her mom, her grandparents, and Nana Gay! :) We got to spend a week in Gulf Shores, AL. We layed out a LOT, got a little bit of sunburn (hehe), played in the ocean, and shopped. We had a great time and it was a good end to the summer!

Funny Story: Laura and I spent the first day laying out a little bit, but mostly we swam in the ocean. The water was really clear and the waves weren't too big so we got a raft and layed across it sideways and mostly just talked and lounged around. A couple of times we saw some pretty good sized fish jump up out of the water a couple yards away from us. We thought it was cool and talked about it for a minute, and then went back to our other random conversations. A few minutes later I noticed this weird feeling like something was brushing across my leg...and then I felt it again...and again...Laura and I turned and looked at each other at the same time and then looked down in the water (it really was like something from a movie. haha) and saw that we were surrounded by HUNDREDS of little fish!! I'm not sure if you would even clasify them as fish. They were more like minnows...but anyway, they weren't doing anything to us but it felt like a bunch of little fingers poking us all over. So we proceeded to run (as well as you can in the ocean) back to the beach and wait for them to pass by. They eventually left so we returned to our position on the raft. We talked about it for a little bit and decided they were probably smart fish (because fish swim in schools!! haha) and were swimming away from the big fish and they just figured it would be safe by us because the big fish would be afraid of the humans. Yes, in our minds fish have just as detailed thoughts as humans! :) Over the course of the day this happened a couple more times and we just got used to it. We would wait it out and then go back out. When it was time for dinner we went back up to the condo to shower and get ready to go out to eat. Laura took her shower and then I went to take mine, and when I did I had a little suprise in my swimsuit! Not one....or two.....but THREE little dead minnows fell out of my swimsuit!!! So gross!! lol. I quickly called Laura in to look and then Miss Patsy took a picture of me holding my fish! haha. So what's the moral to this story, you ask?........Fishing poles aren't actually necessary for fishing! :) hehe.

the end.