If you know me even a little you know that I love memories--making them, carefully recording them, and remeniscing over them. As this semester, and even more than that, my sophmore year of college comes to an end I find myself sorting through a multitude of memories that have flooded through my head these past few days. What a year it has been! People often talk about life being a roller coaster full of ups and downs and that is literally the best way I know to describe this year. I have found myself at the bottom of the Grand Canyon, at the top of Mt. Everest, and everywhere else in between! And through all the hard times and the sweet times God has taught me SO much and molded me more and more into the person I know He wants me to be. Let me try to summarize the year a little:
So I suppose I'll start with the beginning of the school year...I moved into Hughes Hall, room 216 more ready than EVER to be back at school with all of my best friends from here living just down the hall from me. I had a blast working at camp all summer and loved spending my days with the precious kids, but it was harder than I had expected and I couldn't wait to be back in my daily routine at school, surrounded by my "Russellville family". I returned on a "Jesus high" from daily morning devos and nightime worship services. For a while that high kept me pursuing Him and on fire for spreading the name of Jesus across this campus. But it didn't take long before I was distracted by my own selfish desires and agendas--nothing necessarily bad, just centered around ME.
October came with a lot of "firsts". I hadn't really celebrated Halloween since I was little. I usually just go to church and help with the "Reformation Celebration" just because that was the thing to do in our youth group, but I honestly could have cared less about Halloween. Well, that's most definitely not the case at the Mouser house! :) We started out the "scares" with a haunted house in Little Rock--my first time ever. I was PETRIFIED standing in line for an hour before we got in. And I may or may not have ever let go of Rachel's shirt and it's possible that my face was burried in her shoulder for three-fourths of the journey through it. Haha. Butttt....it was a fun experience and once we got out I decided that "it wasn't all that bad" and I actually had a lot of fun! Halloween in Harrison means LOTS of decorations, candy, cooking (witches fingers, ghost cookies, kitty litter cake...just to name a few!), a party with close friends from church and the community, a cosutume contest, and sitting out on the porch fully dressed in scary costumes ready to give candy to the trick-or-treaters. We spent most of Friday night and Saturday dumpster diving, collecting supplies, designing, and creating our costume--tetris pieces. Saturday night was the party at the Mouser house and then off to another haunted house (a little more fun and not so scary the second time around!). And Sunday was sitting on the porch passing out candy. I thoroughly enjoyed it and look forward to doing it all over again this year! :)
Thanksgiving was different than normal...Usually Mema and Grandpa come to our house, but this year it was just Mema. Grandpa passed away on October 15th. I guess you could say it was somewhat expected because his body had been infected with cancer for a long time. But a death, no matter how expected or unexpected, is never easy. It took me two weeks before I fully came to grips with the fact that he was gone. And then the emotions came over me all over again the week of Thanksgiving. It was the little things that I wasn't prepared for, like looking over from the kitchen and seeing Dad and Mema sitting on the couch tearing the bread for the dressing. That was always Grandpa's job...he would sit at the table and work on it dilligently until it was finished. So that was hard, but good to be home with my family and spend that time with Mema. It's hard times like that, that bring you closer to people and strengthen your love for them.
Christmas break rolled around and, as usual, I was dreading it a little bit. Of course, I love the Christmas season and time with my family and friends from home, but a month away from my "home" and friends here always seems so long! It was a strange break for me as I realized how much I had changed over the semester. I went home drained and overall just really discouraged. I was confused about what was wrong and why the semester had been so hard for me. The days before Christmas were hard...I was just annoyed and frustrated feeling like I didn't have a "place" in Little Rock anymore. My friendships from home weren't the same, I wasn't the same, and even my relationships with my family members weren't the same. After Christmas I was blessed to talk over lunch with my precious best friend and mentor, Krista Spoon, and then to get coffee with my parents. Both of those times were very eye-opening to me and I realized that I had lost myself trying to fit a mold and be someone I wasn't. Not really anything big, just stupid stuff. I spent some time in prayer and just thinking over things and was so relieved to just give my life back over to Jesus and re-prioritize my time and what really meant the most to me in life.
I got to spend New Years Eve in Harrison and at the river house with Kiwi, Jilliann, Rach, Tordawg, and Callie (who had decided by then that she was transferring from Bryan to Tech!!). Originally, I was supposed to be in India on a mission trip over New Years, but God had other plans for that trip and all of us planning to go on it. After a few days in Harrison I went back home for a few days of packing up and then back to school.....FINALLY! (I really do love school, Russellville, my church, and my friends here if you can't tell!)
Classes this semester were a little easier for me. Not easy...but easier, which I have been very thankful for! :) I feel like the first two months were spent counting down the days to spring break a little bit. haha. We didn't know what we were going to do but the five of us girls knew we all wanted to go somewhere together! We decided less than two weeks before the break that we were going to take a little road trip to Destin, FL. Four days on the beach and two in the car with four of my best friends made for wonderful break from the cold and dreary Arkansas weather. We made it back safe and sound with lots of funny memories and good times that I will never forget.
After a week back at school we headed out the very next Friday to Ft. Worth, TX for the Passion Conference. It was a 3 day conference for 18-25 year olds. John Piper, Louie Giglio, and Francis Chan were the speakers and worship was led by Chris Tomlin, Christy Nockles, David Crowder Band, Charlie Hall, and there was a surprise appearance by Lecrae (which I may or may not have freaked out about....to say the least! haha). God turned my world upside down in these three days!! He showed me things in my life that I needed to change that I didn't even realize about myself. I got to experience worship with 10,000 other Christ followers my age, with hands raised toward the heavens, singing to our Savior and welcoming Him to "rain down on us". I was blessed to be able to grow closer to five of my very best friends in a way that we had never grown before because it was through our love for Christ and our desire to follow Him and be used by Him to make more Christ followers.
We came back to school with a passion and a fire for spreading the great news and wanting everyone we know to "get it" as Louie Giglio kept putting it--not just knowing the truth but getting the truth and living it out! The Lord gave us the idea of starting a prayer movement at school, so the night we got back we started spreading the word that we were going to meet on the third floor balcony of the school library at 11:11 p.m. to pray for our campus. The first week we ranged from 8-18 students holding hands and lifting our voices out loud all at once to our Savior begging for lives to be changed and for Him to use us and move through us. We continued it through the rest of the semester (weather permitting), and although it has moved to the sidewalk behind the library and we have fewer people, it has been a consistant few and a sweet time to stop, come together, and end our busy days with a time to re-focus our hearts on our most important mission at school!
I ended my semester with a trip to Harrison this past week for five days of just chillin' and hanging out with the girls.....except Tori who didn't end up getting to come. :-( We spent time at the river swimming, fishing, and catching crawdads; hiked; stayed up late watching movies; slept in till we couldn't sleep anymore; made dinner together; had an evening of "name that hymn" with Rachel's mom on the piano with the electricity out; and even made it to an awards ceremony for Zac (Rachel's brother)! Overall, it was a fun week and I was thankful for the sweet time with friends before summer started and we got busy with working. The year was a good one. There were ups and downs, as usual, and I'm thankful for all of them and what I learned through it all. :)