Trying to restart

Today has not exactly been the fresh start to my knew year that I was hoping for. I stayed up much later than planned last night (having fun with friends of course), and as a result, got up much later than planned this morning. Since waking up I have done basically nothing. I'm still sitting around in sweatpants trying (and failing) to motivate myself to do something!

My life has been non-stop since last semester began. The semester was busy and the break has been busy. I move back to school a week from today and I am determined that I will start out and finish up this next semester SO differently than I did the last one! I want to start out putting my best foot forward with classes and getting the best possible grades while it's easiest to do that. And I want to finish well, rather than having to kill myself at the end to just barely make the grades I need. I want to excel in school, not just pass.

I want to spend more time with my Savior--time reading, praying, listening, and growing. I want Him to be my priority! Last semester He wasn't. And I honestly believe that was my biggest problem! I was trying to do everything by myself and in my strength. I have discovered that I am weak. I can't do everything on my own. I fail at life when I try to do it apart from Him who strengthens me. I want to start out knowing my memory verses for Flame and not just knowing them for the week...I want to really memorize my verses and know them from the roots of my heart and not just the surface of my mind.

I want to become selfless. Last semester I focused so much on myself. I did go through some hard things...really hard things actually. I struggled. But just because I was struggling didn't give me the right to focus on myself! If I had stopped to take the time to look around I'm sure I would have seen other people near me who were struggling just as much or maybe even more than me. And more than likely many of those people didn't have the hope in Christ that I have to carry me through the hard times. They needed encouragement more than I did and I never stopped to be that encouragement. I want to learn to give of myself until I'm completely empty and then return to Christ and only Christ to fill me up again. I'm not good at this, but I want to learn to be.

I have so many thoughts, goals, and ideas in the back of my mind....so much I want to change....so many ways I want to grow.....and only one week before school starts to get it all together. Better get started!